The whole "lying" about motherhood is an interesting topic. There are so many different things that bring us to that particular moment, where we are asked by a pregnant mom, or mom with a newborn about our motherhood experience. I've noticed with myself especially, even asking about my two kids would've brought distinctly different answers, and not just because I didn't have PPD with my second, but because my second's head doesn't spin 360 degrees like my first's did. :) I think also you have to think about your community of friends. As a Christian, I too find that a lot of women will go on and on deliriously about how sweet and wonderful motherhood is, while effortlessly breastfeeding their cloth diapered baby, who doesn't interrupt church with his screaming. While my friends outside the church looked at it differently. "SLEEP NOW. WHILE YOU CAN." Oprah did a whole show on this three or so years ago, and the mom's were talking about how they felt lied to. I guess it just all depends on who you ask, on what day, and how THOSE parents kids are behaving at the moment. I don't think it's an issue of everyone being a liar so much as we need to be more open about the ulgy stuff too. Or at least mention it, or someone write a book or something.

I think that we just need to have these discussions as Moms, even if it brings out a few ugly emotions. Obviously some people are dealing with those. :) Sorry that all three of you lovely ladies are now having to referee this.

I love Allison's blog (that's how I found your post) and I love Mom's who are real about motherhood. Even if it's a position I disagree on. I admit I had a visceral reaction upon first reading the post, but I think that's a lot my own personal demons of feeling bad I dealt with PPD it in the first place. Thanks for your apology regardless, but it's not your issue. It's mine. :)

I also get what you're saying about PPD. I guess for my personal taste...it's just too black and white of a position. I think it's a better service of all our time to have some patience and love for one another.

Your words weren't hurtful to me personally, so no worries there. I guess my concern is less cheapening the whole PPD issue, as my lovely little experience has no way of being cheapened. :) It was VERY colorful and I'm even able to laugh at a lot of it now. It was more that PPD or not, expectations aside, life aside...motherhood is the best of times and the worst of times. Neither should be underestimated. The highs are highs, and perhaps the lows are PPD, or just taking a minute with a pack of smokes.

Again thanks for the healthy discussion and I'm sure that with some love and understanding everything will be fine. :) Take care!!!

New commenter/reader. I too love your candor, and everyone's comments but I guess my first response is WOW. That's harsh. REALLY harsh.

Just to be open, I struggled with PPD and mine had psychotic episodes. I was certifiably crazy. Everyone told me to suck it up, and the little voices would go away. Even my doctors. Yep. My doctors. When I finally got where I needed to be, they couldn't believe I lasted as long as I did. I've been medicated and fine ever since. So while I understand the PPD from my first child, my second I was PPD free. It was like night and day. I know it's been said but I think it's dangerous to make such sweeping statements about a MEDICAL CONDITION that has a lot of bad press.

So from the other non-PPD perspective I think these comments perfectly point out why so many women struggle period. What happened to helping a woman out? Maybe she didn't grow up around kids, maybe she doesn't know...maybe, maybe, maybe. Why are we so quick to judge other moms and their experiences instead of sharing candidly, and offering love? I guess whether a woman has PPD or not isn't really the issue. Why would you respond to someone struggling with put on your big girl pants? Shut up, leave me alone? Um, I'm sorry but I just really think that's an awful response.

I guess what I'm saying is what you think you know may just be the tip of the iceberg. We're all just moms, human beings trying to wade through. Why be so terrible to one another? What does that do?