Great piece, though those comments...did they even read your piece? Apparently freaking not. Reminder to self: NEVER READ THE COMMENTS.

Brilliant post. Even as a white, ignorant child, there was always something that really unsettled me about Jasmine. Her body wasn't...real. The huge breasts, the tiny waist. It seemed so fake and forced. It wasn't until I got older and could put it into a more global and historical context that I realized just how messed up it was.

If we put this much energy into solving social issues...

No, not one way street. I misinterpreted what you wrote, I admitted it and I apologized. And, yes, you don't get it. You don't get what it is like to be degraded and erased because of your sexual orientation or your gender identity, just as I don't know what it is like to be degraded and erased because of my race. This is not the Oppression Olympics. We both know how it feels to be degraded and dehumanized, but for entirely different reasons.

And I realize you are trying to have a different conversation. That's the problem. You're talking the talk, but not actually acting on it. It's all well and good to say you are sorry, but when people come in and point out issues with your "apology", your response is once again, "Well fuck you, where is your blog? What do you do?" You're apology means shit unless you actually listen to the people you hurt, which you are not doing. Faith without works is dead, just as words without actions are dead. You may be saying you take responsibility, but you sure as hell are not acting like it.

And, you know, I am sure I am just going to get another, "Well you fuck up, too!" response. You have successfully triggered me into feeling erased, degraded and dehumanized. In other words? I feel like a piece of trash. Congratulations. This is the effect your "apology" had.

You still. don't. get. it. This is not about my fails. Yes, I have failed. The internet is littered with my fails (because *gasp* I blog about social justice stuff too! Am I worthy enough to comment now?). I was not attempting to school you about anything - I was merely trying to draw a parallel. But I see that I misinterpreted your words, and for that I am sorry. But, again, this is not about my fails. This is about YOUR fails and how you are continually making excuses and trying to shift the focus. Can't you see how hurtful you saying, "I'm sorry, but..." is? Renee, it hurts. As part of the audience you are trying to apologize to, you are hurting me. And not just me, but other people who are also a part of your target audience. I don't know how much clearer I can make this.

Yes, Renee, it is true that we all make mistakes. I know I certainly have made my share. But this blog and that post are not about my mistakes, or Farron's mistakes, or anyone's mistakes other than yours. And no amount of finger-pointing is going to change that. I own my mistakes, and I try to learn and grow from them. And even though you claim that is your goal here, I see less and less of that with every post you make. Your hole is so deep at this point, I am surprised you can still get internet access so close to the Earth's core. And it hurts and saddens me as some one who looks to you to learn that you are either unwilling or simply unable to see that.

I was the one who referenced the fact that I get enough flak from the Christian right and I shouldn't have to get it from supposed "allies" as well. (Which, honestly, I wish you just would have named names when you were writing this post. It really passive-aggressive to pull the "well, some people..." card.) As you yourself say, intent is not magic. Hurtful words are hurtful words, whether they come from an ally or an enemy. Hell, they are sometimes even more hurtful when they come from an ally - at least we expect them from an enemy.

The fact that you continue to sit here and defend the fact that you are not homophobic or transphobic shows that you are not truly sorry and are not interested in learning and growing from your mistakes. You have cis and straight privilege, and you live in a society that upholds it. Of course you are homophobic and transphobic, just as White people who live in a society that upholds White privilege are, by default, racist (which is something you yourself have claimed over and over). Not because it is something they want or actively choose to be (although some do), but because that is how they are raised and conditioned. The trick to not being those things is not to stick your fingers in your ears and scream as loud as you can when people point that out, but instead to say, "Yeah, you know what, I am. And I hope and pray that through listening and learning and unpacking my privilege, that one day, I am not."

Because Renee is not interested in having a mature conversation. She has repeatedly told people to fuck off and has dismissed perfectly legitimate criticisms because she can't verify the social justice creds of people writing them. How is that in any way trying to have a mature conversation?

Yes, I do.

I am a single, genderqueer person raising a child who was conceived as the result of rape by a stranger. My child in no way needs his "father" in his life. Not only was your original post insulting and hurtful to queer, trans* and non-binary people, but it was also hurtful and insulting to those of us who have damn good reasons for not having our child's sperm donor in their lives. As the child of a father who was there for me when it was convenient for him, I feel that girl's pain. Oh, believe me, I feel it. There were many, many nights where I sobbed my eyes out, wondering why my daddy didn't love me or want me. But my child's "father" is a rapist. He raped me, and my son is a product of that. I already hear from the Christian right how I am damaging my son, brainwashing him and how he is doomed to a life of crime and failure because I had the gall to work my ass off so I could raise him as a single, parent. I shouldn't have to hear from the people who are supposedly "defending" our rights, too. You claim to want to teach your children how to be open and accepting, yet over and over again, when people call you on your shit, your response is a knee-jerk "Well fuck you, what do you do?!" as if the only way their opinion matters is if they have a blog and an audience and somehow measure up to your standards of "good enough".

Do you want to explain why you believe it was half ass?

Wait, I thought it wasn't up to the marginalized group to educate the non-marginalized group. Isn't that what you always say?

...So all of the people who came into that thread that ID as genderqueer, trans*, queer and intersex should, what, just shut up and sit down and let the cis straight folk edumacate them on what's wrong with their families and how they are dooming their children to a life of failure and misery because they don't have "real men" in the lives of their children?