Before our lectures this week, I admit that I had some negative thoughts towards illegal immigrants. Clearly I’ve always been much too quick to judge on illegal immigrants because after Sam’s lectures this week I feel quite differently on the discussion around immigrants. I feel much more educated on the situation and now don’t view illegal immigrants so negatively. While I do think they should have to go through the legal process just like other immigrants, I understand now that most of those people who immigrate here are honestly just looking for work opportunities that weren’t available in the countries they are coming from. Sam made a very good argument that the people immigrating here are anything but lazy because it takes a lot of courage to illegally immigrate here and when they get here they’re taking jobs that no one else was willing to take, working three times as hard, and being highly underpaid. Anyone who is willing to go through all of that in order to help their families out is anything but lazy and should not be looked at in a negative way. As Americans we value and idolize hard working people, it seems strange to me now how poorly these extremely hard working individuals are. When Sam said that I thought about all the people I’ve seen working in the kitchen and stuff in restaurants and how they are generally mexican or some sort of ethnicity coming from latin America (not that all of these people are illegal immigrants, although it’s highly likely) but they always appear to be working so hard. I personally have never worked in a restaurant so I have no first hand experience with this but I have definitely seen it in many restaurants. Listening to our T.A, Eric, tell his story about how he crossed the border with his family was very eye opening. I don’t know anyone who has that kind of story to tell, it seems pretty crazy to me that he went through that, and he’s someone just like me, a hard working college student. I can’t imagine what it was like to go through that, and to have a father that went back and forth between one country and the U.S in order to make money to support me and the rest of my family. His Father seems like a really good, and hard working person.
Then when we watched the video of people on the boat coming from Europe to Ellis Island, women standing for weeks at a time with their children, through terrible weather. All for the chance to have a better life and a life full of more opportunities. The fact that they went through all this and that there was a chance that once they got to Ellis Island they might be sent back to Europe is crazy! These people have so much will power and are clearly very far from lazy, I think we as Americans should be a little more welcoming of immigrants.

In class Sam defined nepotism as “giving someone a benefit or an advantage, solely on the basis of some identified criteria, that they would not normally receive.” We discussed in class how in college it has become all about who you know, especially when it comes to employment post graduation. Personally, I don’t see a problem with this, if you take the time to make the right personal connections and create strong friendships with people who can help you get your career started then you deserve what ever comes with that. I don’t think having connections is ever a bad thing, and if you are not fully qualified for the position that you received via your connection then you will most likely lose your job shortly, but for the most part you probably received the position because whoever your connection is/was thinks that you the right person for the job. I have already actively benefited from nepotism in my lifetime and I don’t regret the decision I made to take advantage of my connection. My boyfriends mom works at a doctors office and she got me a well paying job there because not only did I need a job but they really needed people to help out around the office. I wasn’t just given a job because I knew her really well and she was doing me a favor, both ends of the agreement benefitted; we both had needs that were met. While it is true that I wouldn’t have gotten that job if i didn’t know her because the practice wasn’t handing out applications nor did they make it aware to the general public that they were in need of assistants, I don’t feel bad for benefiting from a connection. So, if the opportunity presented itself again in the future for me to benefit from nepotism I would surely chose to benefit from it again.

However, I do see the other side of the argument, where people who are perhaps better qualified aren’t receiving jobs because someone who knew someone got the job instead. Being on this side of the equation would be highly frustrating and would appear very unfair. It’s kind of like how people are born into very rich families, as we have talked about in the past, are automatically given more opportunities and options in life. They can go to better schools and have the means necessary to ensure success (for the most part) but it doesn’t mean someone from a lower class can’t become just as successful. I think life is all about what you make it, when good things come your way, why wouldn’t you chose to benefit from them? To chose not to would just be kissing your opportunities goodbye so to speak.

I found Sam and Laurie’s discussion about “the needy penis” to be very interesting, I’m really glad that this was one of the topics covered in this class because I think that it is an important one for college kids to hear. Personally, I think that it’s a discussion that should be had during high school; the majority of young people don’t know enough about sex, especially the differences between male and female in regards to sex before they start becoming “sexually active” .. for lack of a better term. I think if we talked about these differences more then people would be a lot happier with their sex lives. I found the most enlightening part of this lecture to be the information on my own gender, female, because I think that information was less obvious then the information on males. It’s pretty well known how sex-driven men are and how easily they are “ready to go,” I think it’s really important for men to hear how different women are, and for women to know that there’s nothing wrong with them for this difference. When Sam and Laurie talked about how 1/3 of women actually reach “a climax” I think most of the men in the class were probably pretty shocked by this. Women spend most of the time making sure that they’re doing everything they can to please their men, I mean you can see this everywhere, especially in magazines. I’ve read plenty of cosmo magazines that are all “50 ways to please your man” or something to that nature, so while women spend time reading on ways to make sure that their man is satisfied, what about the women? I don’t see men reading tips to make sure that they are pleasing their woman, perhaps there should be some kind of magazine for them to be reading so that woman can be equally as pleasured. Although it does seem that men are out to ensure that they finish, without giving much thought to the woman’s needs.. or at least that’s kinda how it sounded in the lecture, I think that if you’re in a serious relationship the man is often concerned with the woman’s needs. I mean I don’t know if all guys are like that but my boyfriend is really good at making sure that he’s not the only one reaching a climax.
I think this lecture was really important for everyone to hear, and I hope that the guys who were in the room are more enlightened to how a woman works and that they will use the information they received to enhance their sex lives. I’m really glad this was a topic we covered, I think it should be talked about more often.

When Sam and Laurie talked about this in class, I really began thinking about it. Obviously as a female here, I have noticed the "State" dress code and I always see girls in tiny miniskirts or dresses in platform heels, some wearing just light sweaters or even no jackets at all in like 20 degree weather. I always thought that was a bit unnecessary and wondered why exactly girls felt the need to dress like that. I thought it was interesting when Sam said that men control our society and the reasoning behind so many of the actions and choices of women really come down to following what men have set out for us. It's really strange to think that, like in the case of the kids with the black and white baby dolls, we might not actually like what we like because we genuinely enjoy it, but because we're conditioned to believe we do.
I have heard girls say they dress like that because they sincerely like it, but honestly, who would enjoy wearing next to nothing in freezing cold weather? Or walking around in shoes that are neither comfortable or practical? I feel like sadly, it's true that a lot of girls probably don't really like dressing like that, we just think we do because society tells us we should. We're taught from a very young age that girls should be into make-up and jewelry and getting dressed up. All the magazines and television shows and advertisements we see force us to believe that if we are to be successful or liked, we have to fit a certain mold. Even magazines that are specifically for women and have a predominately female staff tend to push women towards a certain mold.
Guys, on the other hand, can really wear whatever and not be criticized for it. If a guy doesn't get dressed up, then it's fine he's just being a guy. If a guy does get dressed up, then he's practically commended for it. Women, on the other hand, are expected to dress up and if they don't, they'll probably be criticized for it.
To be fair, a lot of this pressure and judgment come from women themselves. I've heard plenty of catty comments from girls making fun of another girl for what they were wearing.
I don't think my views really changed on this issue after the lecture, although it did cause me to think about this topic again. I've always thought it was really unfair that in this male-centric society, women are held to such absurd standards. I don't personally enjoy wearing heels and tiny tiny skirts in 20 degree weather and I don't, but I understand the pressure behind it.

When I was a little kid interracial relationships was pretty much a foreign concept to me, simply because none of my neighbors or friends parents were interracial relationships.. it wasn’t something I had ever seen, even on t.v. However, when I grew up a little, especially now, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with interracial relationships, they’re the same thing as any relationship. No two people are the same, everyone has different families and different backgrounds, the color of you and your loved ones skin should not affect your relationship at all. People fall in love with a person, with their personality, not with the way they look.. or at least that’s how it should be.
I don’t have any first hand experience with interracial relationships because all of the guys I have dated are white, like I am, but I really don’t think any of my friends or family would treat me any differently if I did date someone who was of a different race. When my older sister went to her senior prom with one of her best guy friends, who happened to be black, I vaguely remember my Dad making some comment about him being black but I found it really ignorant so I just ignored him. I’ve never heard my Dad say anything specifically against people of color before but he does discriminate in his own way... I am just about half Irish and half Italian (the Italian coming from my father, and the Irish coming from my mother) and for as long as I can remember my Dad has always told me that I need to marry a man who is also Italian so that my children are “nice and tan.” Believe me, I know how weird this sounds, but that is what he’s always said, and I have always found it really ridiculous. Because I have never tanned well, thanks to my Irish blood, my Dad says I need a nice tan Italian guy to even out my Irish blood. I know this isn’t the same thing as black vs. white because Italians, and all Europeans, are considered white I think it’s so bizarre, like how can you discriminate against other Europeans, especially with my Dad because he married my Mom who isn’t Italian, I wouldn’t be here if he had married someone who was tan and Italian. I just don’t see anything wrong with interracial relationships, you should be with the one you love, no matter what color their skin is. I think interracial relationships are becoming more and more prevalent and accepted, hopefully this conversation is one my children never have to think about because it will be such a common thing.

I found Wahls speech really well done and vey moving. I think he presents a really good argument and I agree with him that I do not think that it’s okay to tell gay couples that they aren’t allowed to get married. If two people love each other they should be able to express that love through marriage if that’s what they want to do.. no matter what their sexual orientation is. The Government can not say, or prove, that a homosexual couple is incapable of loving and raising children in the way that a heterosexual couple can. I think it’s so unfair gay couples aren’t given the same rights as straight couples.
This conversation is one that I have had many times, especially with my father who is extremely Catholic. I am Catholic too but I believe in being able to hold my own opinions and not sticking by every single rule of the church like my father does. I think it’s perfectly fine that he is like that, he was raised that way and that’s all he knows, and honestly I think he is just uncomfortable with the idea of gay couples, for reasons I am not sure of. Whenever we talk about this topic in church, I get really frustrated with the things that my priests say. I just find it really ignorant of them to stand up there and preach about how all of us should be so against gay marriages, they call it a “disgrace to the act of marriage.” How can you claim to be so holy and say God loves all of us for who we are and then say that homosexuality is wrong and that two people of the same gender should not be allowed to be married? If God created all people and loves them all equally then that means he also created gay people and to me that means they should be able to be happy and do all of the same things a heterosexual couple can. The main reason I feel so strongly about this topic, besides having guy friends who are gay, I also have aunts that are gay. My Mom’s only sister is gay and has a partner who I have also called “aunt” for my whole life. I love my aunts and I want to see them happy, if they want to get married and have a family then they should be allowed to, they law shouldn’t have the right to tell them other wise. I believe they would be highly capable of raising children, their sexual orientation has nothing to do with their parenting skills. Zach Wahls made that fact very clear in his speech, he has clearly grown up to be very intelligent and accomplished with two Mom’s as parents. I really hope that one day the law is finally passed to allow gay couples to marry, in every state.

Is it selfish to have for people in poverty to have more kids because of their lower income? To be completely honest, I do think that it is kind of selfish of a couple with a very low income to have a ton of kids. Such as the woman in the video who was one of twenty two children who said that despite how hard her father worked they were always very poor. If her parents would’ve had less children perhaps they would have lived more comfortably. I do think that children are a blessing and obviously I would never say that someone shouldn’t have been born just so their family could have nicer things, I don’t mean to say that at all. I just think it is much more responsible and appropriate to have as many children as you can afford to. If you and your spouse want more than twenty children you need to be able to support, house and feed that many children, and if you can’t than maybe you should consider having less children. Honestly I just don’t think that it’s fair to those kids. If you do have that many children and you can’t afford to support them then maybe you should consider giving them to a couple that can give them a happy and healthy life.
Take the “octo-mom” for example, she had eight children at one time and then planned to have even more kids although she could not even handle the kids she already had! I’m pretty sure she was a single parent and she did not work, she was living off welfare and already had eight babies that she couldn’t support. I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be rude or offense but she should not have considered having more children when she couldn’t even support the ones she had! I think it was pretty clear that she was doing it for the publicity, she wanted to be on a reality show to try and make money off being famous, instead of trying to get a job! She also thought that having more children would get her more welfare money, that’s terrible! She should have been focused on how she was going to support the kids she already had.. how she was going to clothe and feed them. The way I see it, it is a persons job who is a parent to be the caretakers of their children. If you don’t have a job, or you have a very low paying job I think you should plan out how you’re going to support another life before you go about having kids. I think that is the responsible thing to do, and to have kids with out being able to feed or clothe them, or give them a place to sleep is cruel and irresponsible.

After watching that movie on thursday I was just in shock, it made me feel sick to my stomach that people have to live their life like that. I was one of those people who just could not eat the second piece of chocolate, I felt so terrible. When the man at the end replied that people who eat chocolate make him sick and that they are “eating his flesh” I just felt so incredibly terrible for all of those people and bad for how luxurious my life is compared to theirs. It is not right that people are forced to live like that, I could not ever imagine my life being like that. The vast majority of people in America live extremely comfortable.. I know obviously not everyone is extremely comfortable but the majority of people are. You do not see or hear about any enslaved people here, so yes, there are homeless and poor people but there are not slaves which, in my opinion, is the most miserable type of living imaginable. Could you honestly imagine being forced into nearly impossible manual labor day after day, without ever being paid? And if you ever tried running away they beat you until couldn’t walk? It makes me cringe to think about that type of living and the men in that video we watched. While here in America we’re worried about buying things like purses and shoes for hundreds of dollars, enslaved people across the world don’t have a dollar to spend on food. I just feel so bad for how much I have taken my life with all its luxuries for granted when thousands of people have absolutely nothing, not even the power to make their own decisions. If nothing else homeless people in America at least have the ability to make their own decisions and go where they please. Slavery is the most corrupt thing you could ever do to another person, I honestly can not wrap my head around the thought process of slave owners. I do not understand how they could ever do that to another human being. I think it’s important that we people in America are aware of slavery in other countries and that we do all that we can to put an end to it. I am not exactly sure what those things are, since as Sam explained, slavery is much bigger today then it has ever been in the past, but we need to come up with some plans to help out. We are so so lucky to live in America and to have all the things that we have and to always know where our next meal is coming from when thousands and thousands of other people do not.

I found Sam’s “King of The Mountain” example to be very insightful and thought provoking. He presented a concept that I find to be pretty accurate, I’ve just never really stopped to think about it. If this idea is true, if white people won the race to the top and have, ever since, been only looking out for their own people, and never stopping to consider a person of another ethnicity, that is pretty pathetic. Are we really that ignorant and shallow of a society that we can’t let people who are different then us in? I think it’s really about time for everyone to grow up, and step outside of our comfort zones, if that’s the reason for only sticking to people of our own kind.
Personally, I don’t think race should be this much of an issues, I think the main, underlying cause is that people are just too afraid to accept people who are different then them. It is most comfortable and most common to just stick to what you know, and to hang around people who are most similar to your self. However, I think it’s seriously time for us to get out of this mold and to let other people in and give them a chance. We have all seen the statistics, that Asian people are highly capable of making just as much money as white people are, and with money comes power, so doesn’t it make sense that they might claim the “top” such as in king of the mountain? If they do, would that really be such a bad thing? From what I can if money and power are what society things life is all about then we should embrace this different culture with open arms. I personally don’t think that money and power is all life is about, I’m just speaking in general terms here. But, like we saw in the King of the Mountain example, we wish to keep our own people at the top of the mountain, we don’t care if other races are just as capable to achieving the same things we are, we are stuck in this mentality that we got here first and it is our job to hold on to our position- to keep our lead over any and all other races. For step down and give someone else a chance at the top might be to give up some of our power, but I think it’s time to share some of the wealth and power, if someone else is working harder they deserve a spot at the top. Ultimately, we just need to step outside our comfort zones and start accepting others as equals; as people.

Yes, I definitely do the same thing that you do. Outside of the United States when asked what I am, I have responded “American,” because culturally that is who I identify myself with. Although, I don’t think it’s that hard to figure out where I am from when I am abroad in another country, given my white skin tone, and the fact that I can only fluently speak English. However, ethnically, I am, among a few other things, mostly Italian and Irish, so that is what I say when asked the same question inside the United States. I think that most people probably do the same thing because who we identify with culturally and ethnically are two different things. When talking to someone else who lives in the United States we discuss each others ethnic backgrounds because, for the most part, we both culturally identify ourselves as “American” so it’s not necessary to add that. So, when we’re outside the United States and we’re talking to someone from a different country, the conversation becomes one of cultural identification. Although these differences are often not spoken of, they are still prevalent, and I believe, very important. Who you identify with culturally versus ethnically is a pretty big deal. For example, I am ethnically Italian, Irish, a little bit Polish, which are all important to me but because I don’t engage in cultural activities of any of these nations I find the fact that I am an American to be what I hold most important. Culture is how we live our life; why we eat what we eat, and why we participate in certain activities, and watch certain shows.. it’s everything.

I find this to be the case on even a smaller level as well. Here, at Penn State, a very similar question is asked very often, “where are you from?” Although this isn’t exactly the same type of thing I find the discussions to be parallel. The majority of people I have met here are from Pennsylvania so when they ask me where I am from, and I respond “Maryland” they usually are confused when I say which part of Maryland I am from, because generally, they have never heard of it. This is completely understandable because most of us aren’t familiar with places we have never been to, or don’t live near. When I am talking to someone from Maryland however, I can be very specific as to where in Maryland I am from, instead of “a suburb about twenty minutes outside of Baltimore.” I find this conversation to relate the “what are you question” discussed earlier in my response. Who we are talking to and where that person is from can make all the difference in how you answer these types of questions.