"We take on characteristics/attitudes/quirks of those we spend time with."

You make an interesting observation, here, Ben. You know, psychologically, it explains why we get so defensive of people we spend a lot of time with, care about, or even look up to, because those are the people we imitate most, generally speaking.

When someone criticizes, or even merely appears to criticize, such a person, we take it personally, as if WE are being personally criticized or attacked, and we get defensive. From this point of view, we're not being defensive of others, per se, although that's the way it appears at first blush. Rather, we are being self-defensive; an attack on someone close to us is a personal attack against us - at least, that's the way most people treat it, and, it would seem, the way they "see it," subconsciously.

Now, I know the above analysis is FULL of generalizations, and ymmv; but your remark rang of truth, and I just wanted to expand on that a little bit. Always happy to hear another perspective, if anyone cares to further discuss the topic.

TL;DR: My comment is here: http://wp.me/pfeqc-P6

I really wanted to leave you a comment. I started typing, and, after a while, realized that the little scroll bar in the post window kept getting smaller and smaller and further and further away from the top of the scrolling column thingie (yes, that's the technical term).

When I finally finished and submitted my comment, your blog kindly informed me that it was too long. Big surprise. (-.-)

So, I have copied and pasted it on my blog for the reading convenience of whomever has a few minutes to spare. I think it will be worth your time and consideration. So, follow the link above for my comment. Thanks!