Kate,

Thank you for your wicked perceptions, though my take has a different angle.

It took me awhile to catch onto the new avatar / profile image meaning as I was busy with life outside the cyber realm. As soon as I returned some focus and saw the various reactions, on both sides, this flowed out:

"I don't mean to be insensitive, though I may come across that way.

As long as you care about the Supreme Court's decisions (manipulations) and permit the government to continue to legislate your life, and lifestyle, you will remain dis-empowered. That is a Victim Stance.

I'd suggest:

Check out of the Banking.Investment.Complex
Check out of the Government.Subsidy.Complex
Check out of the Medical.Pharmaceutical.Complex
Check out of the Educational.Indoctrination.Complex

Once you seek nothing from the government, it is much easier to ignore their manipulative tendencies. Dealing with Petty Tyrants is really a no-win scenario."

So, it remains to be seen ... the only path I am aware of towards empowerment is to cease being dis-empowered. Different for each, yet with some common themes and threads ...

Jim

Jenny,

You've nailed it all, in eloquent sagacity, here:

"What does this have to do with your sex? Everything. Because how you show up in life is how you show up in sex. More importantly, consider the converse: how you show up in sex is how you show up in life."

Jim

The art of composting. :)

Sagacity, here:

"Granted I still reside, too often, in a mind-fuck, an unhealthy but familiar cognitive place of surreal dissonance. The foreground and background activities of life are a projection. Nothing really matters. When I resist, I create more out of nothing and turn it into hell."

J

{ Courageous } Hmmm ... having explored these realms in my 20s, too, and not (much) since, I find your stream of consciousness and emotions (shared bravely here) deeply impacting.

My first sensation is that we each accumulate across our daily trespasses, and that what was released early (in those 20s) probably is only the purging of the first few chapters for us each. What happens as more accumulates without release? My sense is, it seeks expression. There is a genuine creativity in recognizing stuck energy (& patterns) and formulating an artful release, transformation and ALCHEMY.

The key for me, in reading your narrative, is that while the scripts are different for each intimate pairing, whatever takes us to spaces together, for shared (sometimes intense) experience is one deep aspect of our intimacy.

Jim

An enjoyable and fresh perspective, Ellen. Thank you.

I waited three years between my previous two relationships, with two 'dates' in-between. What I found was I seek about a three to one ratio of solo time now ... one year within, then three as a gypsy. For me, this period seems essential to really explore who I am outside of each relationship. Of course, there is the nuance that had I used that equation after two marriages, I'd most deff, die solo! Grins ... sort of!

Jim

Ohm Y, Freya!

"Somehow that didn’t seem to quite fit as a real answer to ‘why am I here?’ It was more a role or a job description than anything else. It didn’t go deep enough or touch the heart of the question. As I worked with clients, I began to see how many of them mirrored the same desire for understanding, although it was usually hidden under the ‘what should I do’ question."

A healer operates on both sides of the equation (always, in all ways).

Fissures and fault-lines ... tumultuous emotions, carving experience banks, within.
These currents, first flowing intensely across our days, hearts & minds ... then dissipating as they reach our deltas, spilling their contents into the larger body of ... ourselves.

"I was also trying to reconcile the idea that there might actually be an answer to the ‘why am I here’ question with the concept of free will and freedom of choice."

Attenuated Amplifications.

Returning to the question of free will or fate,
within an interconnected web where we relate:
is any choice independent or left untended,
when our thoughts, emotions and deeds,
all ripple and cascade, entangling,
consciousness wrangling,
feeds back always
in all ways?

Co-created
upon one canvas,
colored by our perceptions,
adapting through the receptions,
generating the multiverses and realities,
reflecting cycles of imagination, inspiration,
intention, manifestation, appreciation,
evaluation, reduction, decay,
death and composting,
with the art always,
in all ways,
here.

After the bliss, the laundry remains to be tended, with or without a functioning tumble dry contraption. :)

Cindy,

You exhibit wondrous courage, expressing the moments and chapters of annealing you've experienced in life and your beautiful metamorphic healing perspectives.

Jim

Respectfully Ethana:

Perhaps when we attack each other, we produce the very defensiveness upon which you have placed your focus. Are you genuinely standing up as an advocate for physically, emotionally or intellectually challenged children, or are you seeking to mold someone's expression to your preferences? You carry emotional resistance to a particular word, clearly. We all have these sorts of proclivities. These are our own sets of baggage, and when we attempt to get someone else to lug them for us, we are projecting. Sure, you have every right to read this piece, comment on it and maintain an attack upon the author. In doing so, you also open yourself up to (this) critique of your expressions.

In summary, I don't feel you are merely pointing out the offense you feel in the utilization of the word retarded. It was used in a particular context and while you are aware of that fact, you elected to jab not only the author, but everyone else that commented positively, or in defense, feeling that it was reasonably used in context. From my vantage, no one on this thread intended offense or slung statements in any derogatory way, until you projected upon the author.

We are each, retarded in various ways. We are each, perfectly imperfect and human.

~ Travel lightly.

Jim

Joel,

What an inspirational narration! Deep appreciation for your sharing this.

The Southwest & I have a love affair, and there is nothing complicated about it! I feel the pulse of the planet there, exquisitely.

Jim

I provided my answer on the fly. I'll now supplement it, based upon the original conversations.

Life, Love & Sex may all be approached in various ways -
Stoically, Cautiously, Neutrally, Imaginatively, Creatively, Playfully and Vigorously, to name a few.

My perception of Valentine's Day is mixed, a juxtaposition of commercialism, romanticism and isolationism all wrapped up in red cellophane. Often in our partnerships, we feel alone and isolated and perhaps a day of intentional focus may be the vector for some to nurture their relationship and create more harmony and intimacy. Equally, I've abandoned the focused and ritualistic celebrations of (cultured) specific days, opting to celebrate every damn day as an incredible opportunity.

In the discussion on this inquiry in the writer's group, I offered, in response to what do guys want inquiry, that we'd like our hearts and minds blown (no sex, required, btw ...). I can't speak for all guys (clearly) or without self referencing (double clearly), yet I was asked and responded.

I'd want any and all of my relationships, intimate and beyond, to all contain some magick, mystique and majesty. It is what I seek to bring, when I'm in a groove and in key internally. So, for Valentine's Day, if I woman were to read my heart and mind, and was inclined, she would:

Engage her imagination, and mine.

She would invest some time developing an event that lasted a week or more.

She would tease, via daily e-mails or post-it notes, leaving casual tickles which don't reveal much, yet build anticipation.

She would strike early, say on the evening of the 13th, leveraging the elements of the unexpected.

If she did the above, it wouldn't matter what the final climax was, since she'd already have parlayed, foreplayed and engaged me, on all levels. That is the longer version, of: “I’d wanna be: Embellished with Enchantment, Entraining Ecstasy.”

Jim