I think the churches that started this nonsense can gracefully (or scarily) get back to normalcy by doing the following:
1 - set up an altar on the podium
2 - have all the associate pastors (and the metrosexual worship leader) dress like Levite priests
3 - have everyone who brought a dog stand up
4 - open the sanctuary doors
5 - announce that if the sacrifices are without blemish, may the people begin bringing forth their offerings
6 - get out of the aisle so you're not caught in the stampede to leave the sanctuary
Problem solved.
Everyone knows that in colonial America and earlier the dogs were Puritans! They had enough manners to be respectful, not like those modern little riff-raff Ruff Pomeranians that Jon is talking about!
Amen. I'm pretty sure one of my 3 cats is plotting evil even as I type this. He could definitely use a laying on of hands...
I cringed every time the term "soiled dove" was used. And by the time Sarah left Hosea I was thinking "good riddance". But I really do like the book (in spite of myself). :)
Wow - more confirmation from God for my husband and me. I have mentioned in previous comments that my husband was laid off in March of last year. He hasn't been idle a day - working various small jobs, helping friends, etc. But it's been a struggle. ____Someone actually prophesied over us last year that we were going to start a food ministry. Well that scared me and I didn't really receive it at that point - worrying about failure, and about how WE would make it happen. Now that God has us closer to where He wants us, He gave us the word again about the food ministry. We are stepping out in faith this time. When we don't walk in obedience, we don't walk completely in God's will. Wish we would've grabbed hold of that word sooner. Thank God (literally) for mercy and grace!
I loved that book! I'm a Francine Rivers (secret) groupie. The Voice in the Wind series is my favorite of hers. Every time I read about Hadassah I cry.
I find that the easiest way to invite someone to church is to make it sound like you're being graded on it and offer to feed them after church - like "Hey, our pastor wants all of us to get 3 people to join us at church this Sunday. We're going to this restaurant afterwards that makes the best chicken fried steak in Texas. Would you like to come?". Works like a charm.
Amen to that RK5000. It's not like you're telling them they're going to hell wearing gasoline drawers, you're just inviting them to church. Granted it's easier if there's an event or a special speaker or something. Jesus certainly wouldn't have given a fig about being PC or inappropriate. There are ways to invite coworkers, pray with/for them, etc without being accused of proselytizing at work.
I suggest you do a couple of leg drops on him, then give him a side hug while screaming RAZZLE DAZZLE, then ask him how he feels.
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Contraption