It seems some people want to have it both ways. There are men who want wives to look up to them and admire them as the sole breadwinner, but they don't want potential wives to evaluate whether or not a particular man can function in this role.

Back in my day, there were quite a few guys who tried to impress me with their qualifications as a walking ATM machine. They loved to talk about their careers, their educations, their future plans. In fact, many of them were so adamant that a man identity himself by his career that "What do you do?" was one of the first questions they would ask upon meeting another man.

My husband was a radical departure from this. He had every reason to brag about his professional success on our first date — in fact, I was shocked that he never raised the topic at all. During our first or second date, I was amazed to discover something about him unlike any other young man that is ever met, and it was this quality that made me fall in love with him:

My husband defines himself by his relationship with God.

Do you as a man want to be admired for something other than your earning potential? Then be something else, something far, far more.

The Bible tells us to seek the Kingdom of God first. That means even before successful husbands and feminine, submissive wives. Frankly, I'm tired of Christian blogs being full of people whining about their disappointments with the opposite sex, that not enough men/women meet their particular standards, that not enough men/women make them feel good about themselves. The reason society is in the mess it's in is not because women aren't meeting some cultural norms of femininity but because people are rebelling against God and even the Church is not putting His Kingdom first.

It's the sin of Adam all over again, including the part where he blamed the woman for his own sin.

Stop the blame-shifting and finger-pointing. It's time that, if we name the name of Jesus, we refuse to point a finger at anyone other than back at our individual selves, time for us to repent, time for us to put God first in our lives.