geekymummy, the school you picked has great energy and a great community that has rallied around it. In four years everyone is going to think you were the smartest family around (esp that you don' have to commute halfway across SF to go to Clarendon twice a day!)

Great post, Cynthia - I think we widen what we think of as excellence by widening our definition of a successful life. Is material success the goal? Is happiness the goal? Are the two complementary or mutually exclusive? Is a PhD (or an MBA or a J.D. or an M.D.) a more worthwhile life objective than learning how to fix things or build things with your hands? Every parent (and child) will have different answers to these questions but having these discussions is an important exercise.