Rohan
2p2 comments posted · 1 followers · following 0
12 years ago @ http://italktofood.com/ - my future · 1 reply · +1 points
I have been interested in farming myself, specifically aquaponics because you can grow organic veggies AND fish in a smaller area, using like 90% less water or something. For me, it's more of a self sufficiency thing, but since I myself havn't found my direction in life yet, who knows. If Tyler is into farming, then you should ask him to google aquaponics. I found this website of a company that makes some systems and the have a lot of information on it too: http://portablefarm.com/farm/
Good luck and best wishes for the future! I look forward to the newblog too!
12 years ago @ http://italktofood.com/ - today: i get to dress ... · 0 replies · 0 points
About the story: Is it about a journey of self discovery? Is it based on true events? I feel that generally such journeys involve doing things outside your comfort zone, and maybe overcoming some form of adversity. So you might want to consider either elaborating about how accepting this offer of help from a complete stranger was out of character for "book Aubrey", thereby taking a chance and becoming a bit braver etc., or scrap the idea and find some other way to get her to Yosemite, on her own wits or something.
I also feel that there are some unnecessary details in there, like the bit about the "rosy" cheeks. I feel such things are a bit unnecessary because it seems a bit unnatural for a narrator to think that way. At least if I was washing my face I don't think a possible internal monologue would be descriptive in that way. I hope that made sense.
I also think, that somewhere in there, you might want to introduce your reader to "book Aubrey's" passion for food (talk about it some more), and elaborate on how her current job doesn't really fulfill this. Maybe include a scene that takes the reader through a day in the job to drive the point home.
I really like the upbeat tone of your writing though, and I think, like your blog, it would make for a fun read.
Keep up the good work!