Can I just say....Thank you? Thank you, Mrs. Clinton, for a genuinely moving note to all of us working our way through this silly universe as women (or supporters of women, hey dudes!), and thank you to Nikki, Nicole, & Mallory for giving us such a wonderful community, such thoughtful, hilarious, and inspiring posts by so many (seriously, SO MANY) amazing, diverse writers. I didn't post in the link roundup, but I'm honestly just so appreciative of all of you. So much love, my dear space witches and toasties. Let's keep pushing forward, on to the sea, and never look back.
This was brilliant! Thank you so much for all this insight into what has always been my favorite character in GE. ...yes, now that you mention it, I am a bit odd....
"Anyway, here's A Christmas Carol..."
"a formal request" (a petition) after being told no already (and according to LW many of the other interns were also told no) is pretty dang aggressive and tone-deaf. The changes allowed to the other senior coworker were a) none of the interns' business and b) for VERY good reasons. BUT, even if you don't like the reason the dress code exists, even if it's stupid, the workplace is not a democracy, particularly as an intern. Dress codes are small fry. Look at what you're learning to do, whether you're being compensated for that education fairly, and go from there.
I've been trying for several days now to figure out how to explain what the Toast has meant to me and how much I'll miss it. Like so many of you, I wandered over from the Hairpin, and gleefully left just about every other "women's website" I had halfheartedly followed in the dust. The Toast's amazing array of writers opened my eyes to so, so many things, letting me explore and understand race, sexuality, politics, humor, and devastatingly great writing in the middle of a community I actually felt a part of. I felt understood here (still do, but ya know), and as a result, I think over the past 3 years I've actually been better able to understand myself. So....thanks. Not just to the Toast as an entity/website, but to all of you, the commenters, because you're equally valuable to me. <3
Yes, the sentence about what it means to be a grown-up was problematic for me, mostly because I am someone who has a nasty habit of putting everyone else's needs so far before my own that it can be actively harmful. I know that wasn't AA's intention, but the doormat part of my psyche was like, "oooh, look, confirmation! Now roll over again!" It has taken me a VERY long time to realize that choosing to (minorly, marginally) hurt someone else rather than myself was even an option.
This resonated with me in so, so many ways. I vaguely knew about IKDG when it came out, but wasn't really immersed in evangelical culture until college. And woo boy, was I ever immersed. 20-30 year olds espousing these beliefs are really something, let me tell you. And it has taken a solid decade for me to move on/deal with how twisted my views became because of purity culture and the evangelicalism associated with it.
Also, I 100% started crying at my desk reading this: "Verdell: Lyz, that scripture has been a well for me. Because I often don’t have the answers that people desire for what my beliefs are but I know that they are there. My salvation, whatever that means, is a mystery. Not in the sense that it’s a secret, but in the truest sense of the word: a story that is constantly and continuously playing out that I have a chance to participate in."
Thank you, all of you, for talking about this in such a beautiful, thoughtful way. It's always good to know you're not alone. <3
The important thing is to honor your strange brave quest for truth. The point is that the world is full, and so is your heart, and you’ll find the things you need.
deep, contented sigh. <3 <3 <3
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pjwren 
Thingamajig