Hi! I see this post is quite old, but I felt the need to comment and ask for some insight.

I try to show my fiancé that I respect him and appreciate him. Sometimes I slip up on respect--people have told me before that when I think I'm right I get a rather annoying look on my face that states very clearly that I think I'm right (yes, I know this is unattractive and I'm trying very hard to work on it). Anyway, what I am getting rather good at is telling him the things he does SO well. Being in a relationship with him is BY FAR the best I've ever experienced, and I make it a point to tell him so, and to tell him it's because he treats me so well, accepts constructive criticism well, does many nice things for me, is super hot (well, he is!), is great in his field of work, isn't lazy--I mean, the list goes on for miles, and I'm always trying to think of exactly which things he's really good at so I can tell him so.

Yet when I tell him these things he shrugs them off, and not just with a little, "Aw, it's nice you think so," but in a way that contradicts what I've told him. I frequently hear: "I'm not like that," "I don't do that," "That's not true." Of course, that doesn't mean I stop telling him these things, but I'm not sure how to go about making him believe, at minimum, that this is the way *I* see him.

In this once instance, can't he just see things my way? :)

Kidding aside, in what ways can I get him to see that the way I view him is full of admiration, respect, and appreciation? I try to help him out by doing things for him (acts of service), make sure to pick up a snack I know he'll enjoy while I'm grocery shopping (gifts--I've actually always been a gifter even though I'm a physical touch person), we spend lots of wonderful time together and vary our activities (quality time), we hold hands, snuggle, hug, et cetera (physical touch), and I do say very nice things about him daily (or near daily) (affirmation). All in all, we have a wonderful relationship. It's just frustrating to see him speak negatively of himself and I feel rather like I'm failing him somewhere if he can't believe me when I say nice things about him. Maybe he's just hiding his pleasure at hearing these things, I don't know. He doesn't normally have trouble showing emotion, though, so I'm not sure that's it.

Anyway, insight would be lovely if anyone has it.