I'm so utterly late to this party but The Toast has meant so much to me and I don't know what I'd do without it, and just thank you all so much for being a part of my life these last couple of years. I'm so grateful for this community.
Oh my god, hands down that's what I would be.
I really like whoa potato as an expression of excitement!
It completely sucks to have to second this, but the way that I found out (after I had already broken up with my ex) that he had moved passed the "flirting online for attention" stage to actual cheating, was when my gyno did a STD screening as part of standard practice at my yearly exam and found out that he had given me an STD :( thank goodness it was treatable with antibiotics but, yeah, I second packedsuitcase. :(
My ex did the same thing for a long time, and after I broke up with him (that was just one of the many reasons ultimately), I found out that he had actually taken it a step further and cheated on me. I think it's much better to just cut the ties now, do the legwork before he returns, and make it as easy as possible for yourself. He doesn't deserve your regard. Take care of yourself! Know that we're here for you!
I've never had a desire to join Reddit before right now!
It's also your loss!!! :( we grieve together!
I'm so grateful to have even had The Toast in my life! Thank you guys so much for everything you've done, for just being amazing and wonderful people, and I'm so glad you guys get to do this on your own terms! I'll miss this place so much!
Happy happy birthday!!!! I hope that you do something wildly and wonderfully fun this evening (or whatever time of day it is for you, or will be wherever you are!) to celebrate!
ughhhhh now I have MMMbop stuck in my head. THANKS MALLORY.
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deenuhh 
Thingamajig