"The Sight of Sunsets, Daisies On Hillsides, Etc Fills Me With Appreciation For Nature And Not Palpable Venomous Hatred, Haha That Would Be Pretty Concerning Huh"

"Selling Acid Was A Bad Idea So You Didn't Do It And Eventually Found A New Direction In Life To Replace Sports"

"I Have Exactly The Regular And Healthy Amount Of Investment In My Werewolf Wrestling Persona"

"I Took A Job In Puerto Rico And Had a Lovely Time Wherein Nobody Murdered Me"

"The Magpie Is An Interesting Bird And Not A Menacing, Fairytale-Like Metaphor For Any Terrible People In My Life"

Oh dang! I'll bet that increases the desirability of her whole deal for some people, but as one of those "asexuals", I must now take back my previous statement. I aspire exclusively to the most PG-rated of reading experiences. Plus, on second thought, curling up on the couch in sensible pyjamas is much more comfortable. :^}

I certainly aspire to read books with as much Dramatic Passion (and while draped in the same volume of flowing iridescent satin) as that first woman.

His name being Winston makes the whole thing even worse/better for me because I have a dog named Winston who is also a notorious inappropriate-humper-of-things (in his case, it's primarily my other, much larger dog and not a defenseless musical instrument, but still.)