I used to constantly be offended by my husband when he was not meeting my needs the way that I though he should have been when we were first married. I was taking everything personally. He was never harsh, but there were times that he was distant and agitated, which hurt me because I thought it was because I somehow was not good enough, and it caused me to become emotional and needy...yet how I was acting only pushed him further away! The truth was that he was dealing with some big stresses at work. He was concerned and didn't want to talk to me about it because he did not want me to worry about his income since I do not work. He was actually trying to shelter and protect me....and I heaped more stress upon him by crying and accusing him of not loving me!!!! When really, he needed my love, patience, and support more than ever... I learned my lesson that when he acts more serious it is NOT personal, and that I need to stop making everything about me! We all need the love of Christ, and it is up to us to show it even when we feel weak ourselves...but praise be to God, He is faithful to equip us when we are weak...for His strength is made perfect in our weaknesses!

Oh, that is so sad. I understand the point about working hard and keeping busy with the right things so that our minds/thoughts do not wander where they should not...oftentimes to places of negativity. My husband was just telling me two nights ago that life is short and really there just is not time to waste on negative emotions that lead to nowhere. Again, he is right! We must train our minds to focus on the right things, like it is written in Philippians 2:8... "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."

My husband and I met almost 5 years ago on a Christian dating site. We were married a year later. During our year of dating, and for the first 2 + years of our marriage, we lived four 1/2 hours away from each other because he was in Canada and I was in the US. We had to wait for legal paperwork to go through in order to be together. Because of personal situations we did not see each other on a regular basis. Instead, much of our relationship developed via emails (when we were dating) and phone calls. My husband led us in Bible studies and we focused on studying scripture together. He asked me to help him with some ministry projects that he was working on. This helped us focus on the Lord and not on the personal situations that we were dealing with. Being apart was not easy!

Well, we have been living together for a year and a half, and we have a 19 month old son. Life has changed a lot! I have been very guilty of allowing my emotions to get the best of me. It has been a combination of post-partum depression, grief from the loss of my mother, feelings of being overwhelmed with being in a new place away from friends and family....and so on. I have depended on my husband way too much to make me feel better. Yes, I should depend on him, and he is loving and dependable, but he is just a man. He is a man who works hard to provide for his family in a difficult economy and he has to deal with a lot of pressure. It is not fair for him that I would add to his pressure by being needy and emotional! He has been asking me to go back to helping him with his ministry work, and I have helped, but I also have been distracted and full of excuses as to why I am just too tired and so on....

Last night he took me out (we only have 1 car at the moment) and I looked over at him and saw how tired he was, yet he was taking me and our son out because he wants us to be happy. I was so convicted in my heart for all of my neediness. When we got home he went to his computer to work on ministry work. I wanted to crawl into bed, but I knew that I needed to show him that I love him and care deeply about helping him. I sat with him and typed some notes for his book and did a little research. Immediately, my fatigue lifted, and I was full of peace. My husband was so happy to have me by his side. We were both blessed! As a woman, I over complicate things, when really it is simple! Love God first. Lay aside my selfish needs and desires (by the power and grace of God!!!). LISTEN to my husband and support him rather than give into whatever emotion is swelling up in me at the time....and believe, fully, the truth from 1 John that states: "because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world." With God all things are possible; even overcoming difficult emotions and having the ability to submit to the Lord with all of our heart.

Christian parents need to be very careful in regards to protecting their children. I worked in a public school and I watched children from Christian families get corrupted and/or hurt by the pressures of the world every year. It broke my heart. Christian children who are sent to public school are up against many battles and temptations. The curriculum is against God. The peer pressure is astounding. The enemy is after our children. It is a Christian parent's responsibility to do what it takes to protect children from the many forms of antichrist that are in the world. If Christian parents feel that public school is ok then they don't really understand what it is like for children in public schools today. The Bible says that we are to be separate; being indoctrinated at a young age with ungodly teaching which includes evolution, sexual knowledge and freedom, and the idea that all religions are equal (these are just some of the concepts being taught as early as kindergarten) is not being separate. I know this may sound harsh but I feel very strongly about this. To be salt and light in the world takes strong faith and a solid understanding of God's Word. Children are not equipped for this.

I agree. I suppose some women just have a hard time reading and accepting what the Word says about God's design for women, especially if they grew up being taught to get an education and a job. My husband and I work hard to keep me home. I often feel looked down upon and judged because I "don't work". How far our society has gone from God's design for family!

I have heard some women say that the verse the tells young women to be keepers of the home does not mean that they should not work because they say that they can do both...work and keep their homes, and they do. How would you advise such a woman that God's design is to have a woman home full-time?

"Make up your mind to allow people to be who they are and not try to change them. Love them with all of their faults and allow God to change them in His perfect timing. "

This is HUGE in regards to being happy in marriage! I thought I was a very laid back, easy going woman...until I got married! Then, all of my ugliness started coming out! I didn't even realize how badly I wanted to control my husband until I started examining myself and my own bad attitudes. I was feeling irritated and miserable, and then even more miserable because I wasn't experiencing the peace and joy that I should have been feeling because my hope is in Christ. I had to learn to totally let go of wanting to control my husband and accepting and loving everything about him. I also have to remind myself that I am not perfect. The truth is, life on this earth is short. It is not worth constantly being upset over every little thing. It is better to let go and love! Love God, and love others....when I put my trust in Christ He enables me to walk in love, forgiveness, and peace....no matter what! :)

As a fellow Christian I have a passion for asking questions about where things come from. It is just how my mind works I guess. My family does not celebrate Halloween. We certainly do not go about telling others what to do, though. I do often think of my young child. Will he feel left out someday when others celebrate and he doesn't?

My husband has built me up in this area and has assured me that we will create many joyful and fond memories as a family, it will just be done in other ways...like, I can't wait until my little guy gets a little older and we can play dress up down in the playroom whenever he wants to...you know, things like that. My husband and I have been reflecting more on our convictions for not celebrating and we came across this verse in Deuteronomy:

29 When the Lord thy God shall cut off the nations from before thee, whither thou goest to possess them, and thou succeedest them, and dwellest in their land;
30 Take heed to thyself that thou be not snared by following them, after that they be destroyed from before thee; and that thou enquire not after their gods, saying, How did these nations serve their gods? even so will I do likewise. 31 Thou shalt not do so unto the Lord thy God: for every abomination to the Lord, which he hateth, have they done unto their gods; for even their sons and their daughters they have burnt in the fire to their gods.
32 What thing soever I command you, observe to do it: thou shalt not add thereto, nor diminish from it.

We talked about how God commanded, and still commands, His people to be separate from anything that is associated with other gods, rather that trying to change it into something good. By doing so I think we may be kidding ourselves into thinking we are doing a good thing by shining the light of Christ into the darkness when really we are just compromising what he Word of God commands. That may sound strict but my husband is firm on this and I see his point because that is what Scripture says. He always tells me: It is not about what you 'feel' is right...it is about conforming to the Truth of God and aligning your mind (renewing of the mind) with what God says in an act of obedience and reverence to Him. That is what is most important. Let your feelings follow obedience rather than allowing them to guide you into what you think is right or wrong."

The question is, are there other ways that we can shine the light of Christ without partaking in holidays that have no foundation in the Word of God?