My fiancée is moving in tomorrow. October is great!

Your kids will grow up and talk about their strong amazing inspiring single mom.

I cut a friend out of my life this fall.
They violated some boundaries in a pretty fucked up way and I can't trust them at all. I had hoped I'd be able to be friends again but after violating my trust the one thing I told them to do was not talk to me until I talked to them first and they couldn't do that.
But now I'm dealing with feeling like I'm overreacting and being too sensitive... at the time this happened a lot of our mutual friends were also very angry. He stopped being at parties and things. For a month or two.
Now I show up at places and he's there. Talking with our mutual friends, sharing a table with his ex, who broke up with him after being on the other end of the fucked up boundary violations that happened to me. And it's made a rift. i can't talk to him. I started to panic when we were both at a house party and he walked up the stairs behind me and we were briefly alone in the same space. When he is at things with out mutual friends, suddenly I can't be with those friends. I bring different people with me so I can lean on them if I have to.
And I wonder if I'm being too sensitive, too dramatic. Should I still be this upset? Am I being unreasonable? If the woman he cheated on can forgive him why can't I? Shouldn't I be at a point where eye contact doesn't make me feel nauseous?

I see these friends so much less now.

I asked my brother what he wanted for Christmas.
He responded with an amazon link for a thing that is on sale for 15 dollars and he swears he didn't send the link to anyone else.
He is my favourite right now.

I have a bandeau top bikini. I do the sort of swimming that involves splashing around waist deep water, or doing dives deep enough that I can unroll it back up over my boobs by the time I surface.

oh good now I can cross the Dresden books off my long list of things I feel like I should read because people I like like them. I can only deal with literary sexism if it's a reread of something that didn't bug me as much when I was 13.

that book is sitting right beside my reading armchair so that I can occasionally pick it up and read one or two things and feel tearful and uplifted then not touch it again for a few months.

The number of bad screen names involving 'anguisette' that I witnessed.
Just...honey, no. Even as someone who adores all of those books and got into the kink scene in college and thinks pain is pretty spectacularly fun I had more sense than that. Thank goodness.

I am IN YOUR CORNER.
So damn good. I think I'm giving it to multiple people for Christmas because I'm terrible.

I went on a couple dates this month with a super cool lady and it is kind of the best thing. We went to a screening of Showgirls for a first date and then went to queer ladies night at the local sex club the next week. Wheee!
This night included a conversation where I assured her that I didn't at all mind losing my place in line for the sybian rides to go and find a nook where she could smack me with things.
Tomorrow I'm going to her Hanukkah party. Because life is a rich tapestry.