Thanks for the reply. That... really, really sucks. Due to mental stress stuff, I was following along solely through YouTube and Patreon, and I had no idea this was going to happen. I'm devastated. I don't want Mark to be hurt or get harassment, and I understand that this is best for them. But those videos helped me through dark places many times, and I comforted myself with the thought that at least I could go and rewatch them. Now there's nothing and no way I can see them again. And I guess it's my own fault.

Hey, uh, two things. First: can anyone comment on the newest post, Double Shenanigans? I click on it and there's no comment box, so I'm not sure if we're supposed to use it.

Secondly, after half an hour of hasty, panicked searching of all Mark's various sites: have they said anything about taking down all of the Mark Reads Youtube videos????? I've been finishing up my watch of the Shepherd's Crown videos, savoring them since we won't get any more, and all of a sudden today: boom. Nothing. Did I miss something??? Did anyone know this was going to happen?

[youtube JgQaAz-TzD0 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JgQaAz-TzD0 youtube]

Original tumblr post from creator

This animatic is inseparable from the end of SUF for me. Done in just a few days, it came out right before the last block of episodes aired, so most people ended up seeing it just as we found out that Steven was, indeed, seeing a therapist as of the last episode in the series. That renders the animatic extremely plausible, especially if you picture it as one of Steven's first few visits. 

Everything about both the song and the video fits so perfectly with the series and reflects on each other to give them even more depth. "I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly" - Steven has literally defined himself as a person who helps, and here he is reiterating that as if to convince himself both that he has done nothing wrong and that he is okay, he shouldn't be hurting. "Why am I feeling empty?/It's still getting harder" overlaid with some of his traumas - by explaining the gap between how he should feel and how he does feel, Steven has to acknowledge what's actually going on in his head. This sets off a spiral, and as his traumatic memories keep coming up, Steven gets pinker and pinker and the music starts distorting the way the show's background music did in his extreme moments. The musical bridge is excellent too - showing the important people in his life walking off, the way he feared they would, and setting off a storm of Pink Steven memories. But I think my favorite part is the last section, where all the fear comes pouring out of Steven in one long run-on sentence, the singer's voice raised and desperate with "You say that I'm better, why don't I feel better?!" Throughout the whole video, Jade's drawings of Steven are gorgeous. They look so much like the show that they could be actual roughs and I wouldn't know the difference, portraying emotions and subtle gestures with amazing skill. And the timing of all the clips and changes in scene is impeccable. 

Anyways, all this is to say that the animatic made me feel the same way that this episode makes me feel - that each of us has gone through something hard to bear and it might not be completely over yet, but we've found ourselves in the midst of that and trying to start healing. That may look completely different from what we thought our lives were going to be like! But it's worth doing, and it's worth getting through. And that was a message that was incomparably valuable two weeks into the pandemic, when this episode first aired. I cried watching it. I still cry now. Because it's a very rare thing to have a piece of media like this.

This episode really struck me when airing for two reasons. First, the scene where Steven rushes back home and resurrects Jasper. We've seen Gems poofed before, generally treated seriously, and we've seen the trauma it gives Steven to poof a regular, uncorrupted Gem when he fought Bismuth. This is a step above even that. Onscreen, we've only ever heard of a Gem shattering, never seen, much less when Steven is the one committing that violence. Until this point, we have absolutely no idea whether reviving a shattered Gem is even possible - and Steven certainly doesn't. The complete lack of background music in this sequence underscores the shock and horror that both Steven and the viewer go through - the stomach-dropping uncertainty of whether this act is irreversible. And whether it is or isn't, knowing forever that Steven is capable of such an act. Not even to defend his own life! Not that Jasper was pulling her punches - she was definitely fighting with the intent to win. But Steven had her trapped, unable to move, and still chose to deliver a finishing blow. And this is knowledge about himself that he can't reconcile with who he wants to be.

The other reason this episode haunts me is that this and Mr. Universe were the first episodes of SUF to air after the lockdown. Various parts of the country were taking measures in the previous weeks - episodes 11 and 12 aired March 6th, episodes 13 and 14 aired March 13th. I can't say for certain that this was everyone's experience. But here in Maryland, we had had the previous week of ever-growing uncertainty and dread and scrambling for supplies. On March 12th, we received word that lockdown would start at the end of the week. Soon after, retail stores were closed and a stay-at-home order issued. March 20th found me in a fog of anxiety, stranded apart from my family, uncertain if or when I would have the routine of work or even going to the store again. Steven Universe Future airing as planned was the closest thing I had to a surety at that point. And yet, how could things even in a fictional world go on when everything outside had changed? So I watched - and things didn't go on as usual. Steven cut off his only remaining human lifeline by choice and did something unthinkable in trying to fix his life. His world was falling apart just like ours was. Maybe some people would have been more comforted by an uplifting piece of media, but for me, watching these episodes during that time felt right. We were confronted, minute by minute, with the truth that there was no guarantee everything would be okay and our mistakes would end up all right, and so was Steven. I don't think I'll ever be able to separate these episodes from that resonance.

[full series] "V pbhyq frr gur ebnq gevc guvat jbexvat vs Fgrira jnf nybar" Lbh ner!!! FB PYBFR, Znex!!! Npghnyyl, Znex unf orra IREL va ghar jvgu guvf jubyr frevrf, naq vg'f avpr gb frr uvz nyzbfg cercnerq. Rfcrpvnyyl fvapr gur znva zrffntr bs gur fubj vf nobhg urnyvat. V xabj vg oebhtug ZR gb grnef zber guna bapr, naq V bayl unir yvggyr-g genhzn.

An extra set of Steven Universe Future 9-11: http://markdoesstuff.fetchapp.com/get/2671bad8

I mentally refer to this episode as "Steven's Mansplaining Episode". Not that this necessarily has anything to do with sexism - SU's always been very good in that respect, and I don't know if Steven even has a concept of sexism we would recognize after being raised by the Gems. But Steven has spent a good portion of his adolescence being the one responsible for fixing things and the one people look to for ideas and decisions, to the point that he is now assuming this is a thing Amethyst is showing him for his input, when she's actually showing him the successful results. Steven realizes and owns up to his mistake fairly quickly, but it's a sign of how much of a toll being a child leader has taken on him.

I love the unsettling attitude of Larimar and her fondness for human screams.

[full season spoilers]
Tbbq, Znex'f nyernql fgnegvat gb nfx gur evtug dhrfgvbaf nobhg jung'f arkg sbe Fgrira. Ur'f zragvbarq Fgrira pbafgnagyl orvat fgerffrq, gbb. Jr'yy frr vs ur fgnegf gb cvpx hc ba gur fvghngvbany pbagrkg sbe Cvax Fgrira va gur arkg srj rcvfbqrf.

I also loved this episode as a sort of combination closure and new beginning! I think that you would feel happy if you stopped Steven Universe and never saw Future, or watched the movie and didn't continue, and it's rare that a series makes a sequel that both builds on everything that came before and doesn't ruin a fan's ability to enjoy the previous story. When I watched this episode, I was squeeing like Mark did over how much scene-setting and exposition they managed to fit in, flowing completely naturally!

It's rare that we see an All-Loving Hero like Steven actually give up in frustration and try another route, so that was fascinating. And he learned a valuable lesson! Jasper looks so surprised and happy when she turns and says "Really?" With all of Steven's persuading, the one thing he failed to do was actually get on her level and help her the way she was literally asking to be helped! Even if Steven disapproves of fighting and tries to logic Jasper out of training, it's been her purpose and joy for so long that it's practically her language. Engaging her in the same way is the one way he could get through to her. And it unlocks something about him, too!

Steven Universe Future is a great addition to the SU canon. When I first watched this episode, I was really happy about getting to be in this universe for a while longer and seeing how everything played out.

[full season spoilers]
Nununununun guvf vf tbvat gb oernx Znex. Thnenagrrq.

Yrg'f frr, jura jnf vg gung jr fgnegrq gb ernyvmr fbzrguvat jnf ERNYYL jebat? Yvxr, zber guna hfhny hafrggyvat fghss? V guvax vg jnf Fabj Qnl, rcvfbqr frira, sbe zr. Orsber gung, gur cvax fghss naq Fgrira snyyvat ncneg jrer onq, ohg jr'ir frra Fgrira fgerffrq naq qrnyvat jvgu hahfhny cbjref orsber. Fabj Qnl jnf jurer V shyyl haqrefgbbq gung Fgrira jnf fyvqvat qbja n fyvccrel fybcr naq nyy gur jnlf ur hfrq gb fgbc jrer bayl chfuvat uvz snfgre.

Znex jnagf gb frr jung Wnfcre pbhyq grnpu Fgrira? Bu Znex. Bu ab. Tvir vg svsgrra rcvfbqrf naq lbh'yy jvfu lbh unqa'g fnvq gung. Yvxr, Sentzragf vf YRTVG GENHZNGVP.

Qrfcvgr nyy gung, V guvax gung tbvat guebhtu FHS vf urnyvat, ercerfragvat n irel eneryl-gbyq fgbel va zrqvn nobhg genhzn naq vgf nsgrerssrpgf. V qb ybbx sbejneq gb Znex jngpuvat vg naq svaqvat bhg jung ur unf gb fnl nobhg vg. V jvyy or zragvbavat gur pbagrkg bs gur ynfg fvk-vfu rcvfbqrf - gur snpg gung jr jrer jngpuvat gurz qhevat gur fgneg bs fuhgqbja, jura bhe yvirf jrer orvat erneenatrq - nf gubfr rcvfbqrf tb hc.

It's been a while, y'all. Nice to see you again.

Mushi-shi 1x25 http://markdoesstuff.fetchapp.com/get/0f04215c

Mushi-Shi 1x21 http://markdoesstuff.fetchapp.com/get/ef0b77f2