neptunesnachos

neptunesnachos

135p

16 comments posted · 0 followers · following 0

9 years ago @ The Toast - If Tom Hiddleston Were... · 3 replies · +13 points

no just clive barker's house

9 years ago @ The Toast - If Tom Hiddleston Were... · 9 replies · +45 points

This is not a David Lynch movie this is Los Angeles. A photographer buddy of mine works for Marvel, and is friends with Clive Barker, who throws massive orgies every month. Apparently at the most recent orgy, Tom, Chris Evans, and a gaggle of glistening youths formed a make out ball in the pool while Chris Katan and Fiona Apple had sex in front of everyone.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Movie Yelling: Things ... · 5 replies · +44 points

can we all agree the twins were weird looking, like their faces didn't seem right and their gums were too big

10 years ago @ The Toast - Tell Me About Your Wor... · 0 replies · +15 points

I had an ex who didn't ejaculate because he wanted to "transform it into magic". This went on for two years. When he finally broke down, it was to anime. He maintained that the magical force of his orgasm caused the polar vortex. He hated mangoes and the "Well-behaved women rarely make history" bumper stickers.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Movie Yelling With Nic... · 0 replies · +88 points

"you can’t just sort of ghost out of your sibling marriage"

did u just

10 years ago @ The Toast - My Favourite Deleted C... · 0 replies · +64 points

The Toast: where the only things funnier than Mal and Nicole are the men that get offended by them.

11 years ago @ The Toast - The Misandrist's Prayer · 3 replies · +90 points

*begins cross stitching each one*

11 years ago @ The Toast - Words That Should Actu... · 0 replies · +23 points

"Devil's Advocate"

11 years ago @ The Toast - I Want You To Fight Ab... · 3 replies · +69 points

My opinion about cats is that they have the weirdest buttholes

11 years ago @ The Toast - Femslash Friday: T... · 5 replies · +143 points

Hail to the Guardians of the Watchtowers of the 90's, guardians of combat boots and black lip liner