IntenseDebate - gallimaufry

9 years ago @ The Toast - The Final Link Roundup! · 0 replies · +10 points

Thank you Toast creators, Toast maintainers, Toast writers, Toast commenters, Toast lurkers. Wherever I go in this internets, I will never forget to *creed arms into a sea of haters*.

9 years ago @ The Toast - A note on The Toast · 1 reply · +53 points

I had the same experience when I started out - in fact, the (very small) number of women higher up in the field, were generally speaking, much worse to the junior women than the men. Which is exactly why I go out of my way to welcome and mentor and celebrate every woman I see coming in the door now. ~~Be the change and all that.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Friday Bargain Bin · 1 reply · +31 points

Something about that garden chair makes me think of the Iron Throne from Game of Thrones. New summer patio aesthetic?

10 years ago @ The Toast - Link Roundup! · 1 reply · +43 points

"And I realized, as I was reading it, how this type of thing often leads me to having more paranoid/anxious thoughts about the men I encounter in daily life."

Yes, this, absolutely. I don't want to feel constantly wary - I mean, I appreciate and trust "the gift of fear" when it's appropriate but I don't actually want to be fearful. I've been watching Jessica Jones lately, and I was completely taken aback by how cathartic I found it to watch a woman physically beat up a man in that show, and not just because of what it metaphorically represented (the man is an abuser), but also through some kind of twisted wish fulfillment about how great it would feel not to be small and...prey-like.

I dunno. It's hard to unpick this stuff, or separate it from personal history. Maybe I should instigate a women-only-on-netflix policy is what I'm saying here.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Link Roundup! · 8 replies · +101 points

So sorry for your loss, Nicole.

From the women-only Netflix article, here's something I recognise like a punch to the gut:

I was on a feminist trajectory that had shifted from “girl power” to “we should all have the right to be equal,” rocketed to delighting in misandry as satire, and then chugged to a halt in a sink-hole of ubiquitous violence and genuine mistrust of men.

Oof.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +11 points

You are brave and strong to look for support - I hope you find a good therapist.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +24 points

and yet burning sage every night sounds like a quiet and soothing ritual either way so GO YOU AND GO STREGA NONA.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +11 points

Yes, this last point, 100% agreed.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 3 replies · +20 points

I'm so sorry, that sounds like a lot of hurt. I went through a big break up last year, and a lovely Toast on the open thread recommended the book Live Alone and Like It by Marjorie Hillis to me. I adored it and have recommended it to several friends who have been through break ups since. It's a lighthearted book, but I think it actually helped me quite a bit in learning how to tell a different story about myself post-break up, if that makes sense.

I hope things get easier soon.

10 years ago @ The Toast - Cocktail Hour: Open Th... · 0 replies · +1 points

Oh man. Okay, thanks for the heads up - the fact it is (a) an adult and (b) consensual should make it much easier going, I hope.

IntenseDebate Comment System

Connect with gallimaufry_

People I'm following

gallimaufry_