Point number two crossed my mind as more of a question reading this article. As a black qwoc, I can relate to the discussion of dating a white person vs. someone of my own race/heritage/etc. However, in my experience, dating another POC outside of my race is rarely discussed even though I find myself attracted (not exclusively) to folks who aren't Black and I'm sure I can't be the only one... I am curious as to how other POC communities have reacted to outside dating other POC's...

I too have an awful track record of bad birthdays...mostly involving employers. I recommend moving birthdays to another day.

It's because they changed the recipe. You have to go to the UK to get the original. I actually learned this from the Ronna and Beverly podcast. They have a thing about Cadbury from the UK. U.S. Cadburys are not welcome in their presence.

Fourth picture from the bottom.
Jean-Marc Nattier - seems he was into photoshopping before photoshopping was a thing.
According to wikipedia: "Nattier's graceful and charming portraits of court ladies in this mode were very fashionable, partly because he could beautify a sitter while also retaining her likeness."

YES, I do I do!!!! Thank you ladyraptorclaws for posting your comment- I was hesitant to say anything because I was afraid of seeming like I was imposing on someone else's conversation...

I read this beautifully written piece for that exact reason. I'm 33 and have not seen mother since i was 13. Cutting off communication with children for religious reasons being okay in her world.

It feels shameful because it is it's own kind of death and limbo at the same time. But I feel like I can't tell people that because I think they will they "Well at least there is a chance you can still talk to your mother so you don't deserve to grieve." But there is a loss...

Recently, I talked with a friend who had just lost her father. We were talking about parents and she asked about mine. When I very briefly (and full of shame) explained the situation, she was very empathetic and said it's hard in it's own way because there is no closure. I was grateful to her for those words.

Like ladyraptorclaws, I have had to function like she is dead. I'm just now processing all of this and the impact it has had on my relationships or lack there of. I realize I have been denying the grief associated with this for 20 years and this year I am determine to start the process of healing. I can't go backwards in time and fix anything but I can learn to live my life fully with that mom-sized hole as being part of me. I've been reading the book "Death benefits : how losing a parent can change an adult's life-- for the better" to help with this.

Your comment made me lough out loud in the middle of getting teary about Nicole's cat. I love moments like this.

I have that deck! It's wonderful and doesn't feel too tarot-ish. They really have a way of tapping into the subconscious and hitting on big themes in a person's current situation.

Yeah, I've heard of the fabulous experience of salon shampooing but every time I've had it done, my spine feels like it's electrified. Just bits of electricity shooting up and down my back making me wriggle and wish the discomfort would end soon. Maybe I'm a super scalper or something like those super tasters...

So true about the cats. 35% of my bedroom floor is covered with a rug and yet my black cat cannot find it in her heart (or gullet) to deposit her hairballs on the other 65% which is nothing but painted cement...Always on the dang carpet...This is the same cat who works hard to open all the doors because she feels that she is entitled to go WHEREVER she pleases.

I'm going to try that. Who knows, it may just work.