Maybe the intruder thought the man was so full of sh*t that he was just trying to help the poor man unclog himself. Jimmy and I like to beat each other with toilet plungers after a night of sharing a bottle of Tequila. The next morning, we count the round plunger hickey marks on our bodies and the one that has the most has to buy the other one dinner at Bishops. I always hate eating at Bishops the next day as their chairs are too hard on me since my nether regions are all sore from Jimmy beating me with the toilet plunger. Check your blood and check it often - The good folks at Liberty Medical are there to help so that you do not feel so d amn sorry for yourself while you sit at home in your Hoveround screaming at the tv because Bob Barker is no longer the host of The Price Is Right. Call today - the first 100 callers receive a special "Matlock" edition diabeetus insulin tester autographed by Andy Griffith.
Jimmy and I are cat people
looks like the coloreds are up to their antics again - too much of watching Maury "whos your daddy?" - maybe if the good people of Iowa City started talking in clicks and whistles like the backwards tribes we see on the Discovery channel - the monkey gangs would drop their bats and stop throwing their feces at each other
looks like the coloreds are up to their antics again - too much of watching Maury "whos your daddy?" - maybe if the good people of Iowa City started talking in clicks and whistles like the backwards tribes we see on the Discovery channel - the monkey gangs would drop their bats and stop throwing their feces at each other
Woody's is hiring - that's where me and Jimmy go on Thursday nights. We wear our loose fitting sweat pants and keep our hands in our pockets.
I had an accident in my Depends yesterday while I was at the car wash - I just went ahead, dropped my trousers and had Jimmy power wash me with the hose wand - I made sure he put it on the "hot wax" setting while I screamed out "She's a maniac, maniac on the floor and she dances like she's never danced before!!".
Jesse must have watched Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom one too man times and decided to reinact the scenes where Mola Ram rips out people's hearts with his bare hands and shows it to them while it is still beating.
I flushed my dirty Depends down the toilet after Jimmy and I had a Jalepeno Chili Dog eating contest one night - I just could not stand the smell.
Must have watched too much MacGyver - some things you should not do with a pocket knife
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Thingamajig