10 comments posted · 652 followers · following 0
Yes, no-contact is the best you can do, but unfortunately it may take some time before we realize its necessity.
I agree it’s a terrible experience, but try to see it as an opportunity to grow and improve yourself. I know that this can be a challenge.
Anna, good to hear from you :) . How are you doing?
Anna, I am glad that you didn’t have any side effects, but many of my clients have had negative experiences with antidepressants in the long run (of course it also depends on which one you take). They can have side effects and dangers, so I usually do not recommend them. Besides, I also think that accepting the pain is an important part of the healing, so numbing it is counterproductive.
Guys, please be very careful with those!
I would like to take this opportunity and thank everybody for contributing in this comment-thread, you all do a great job in helping each other. Thank very much!
They only thing you can do to overcome the guilt is telling yourself that you\'ve done everything to save the relationship and that it would be unfair to continue it on the condition you’ve described.
Try to follow the rules I wrote about and help her with no-contact. Besides that there is nothing you can do to ease the pain, unfortunately.
But here’s the thing with guilt:
Guilt exists as a fabricated emotion. It holds little or no realness. It\'s hard to call it a real emotion.
Guilt punishes. Both yourself and those around you. Guilt contributes nothing. It only takes.
Don’t get me wrong, I perfectly understand what you are going through, I just think that it can be very helpful to examine this emotion more closely.
I know exactly what you\'re going through.
When you read through all these comments above you can see that you are NOT alone. Many are going through the same thing right now.
At the very beginning there is not much you can do, except trying to accept the fact that it is over. Once you do, you will feel that you are on the road to recovery.
I advice against anti-depressants, alcohol or drugs, because these things often backfire badly.
Hang in there, it will get better.
I actually write about this in detail in my newsletter (and will be publishing an article on that topic next week).
There are some reasons the \"Dumpers\" want to remain friends. One main motivation is that they still want you in their life for egoistic reasons. They don\'t realize or don\'t care that they prevent the healing process.
The best you can do is to cut off contact completely, means: delete all contact data and don\'t respond to calls.
This is NOT cold and heartless but necessary for survival.
Hang in there!
On the other hand, maybe it would be a good distraction for you, especially on that date. But you have to decide. Either way, it's ok.
You are not overreacting, this is perfectly normal.
I'm sorry, I was really sick for nearly two weeks and the rest of the time traveling to seminars in Europe.
But there will a brand new article today and more in a few days.
I'm still there, no worries :) .
Yes, it takes real effort to escape the vicious cycle of thoughts, but when you do, step-by-step, the real healing will start.
The first step is ALWAYS going no-contact.
Here's the link to a post with lots of comments: http://lovesagame.com/the-secret-how-to-get-over-...
Yes, the problems persist.
Two problems I have right away:
2. No matter what I choose in the settings for comment sorting it always sorts by "last activity" (which by the way outputs in a weird order). I want it to order by date.