Oh God, It's A Spider! AHHH! Wait, No. Those Are Just My Falsies From Halloween.

He also must have been the first man to have given birth. And then possibly become a woman and chastise all men for being girly men with their non-uterui. He/she probably also watched the longest running marathon of Three's Company while crying and broke the record for eating the most ice cream in one sitting.

He also probably won the award for best looking scrotum.

Quite the feat. Way to go, dude.