en-us http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/ Comments from Fewer marriages, fewer fathers http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment666358568So, Joan, an adoptive parent isn't capable of truly loving their child? Nor can the child truly love the adoptive parents? Sat, 22 Jun 2013 18:45:08 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment666358568 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment665389751Neuro chemical David. What I have described is bonding which is constantly overlooked today. Yet over the twleve years of my study, this was considred a significant factor in parent to parent and parent to child relationships. Fri, 21 Jun 2013 05:04:49 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment665389751 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment664965751Joan, are you suggesting that love is chemical? Thu, 20 Jun 2013 13:14:11 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment664965751 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment663265324I believe we should teach our children by example. I admit this isn't always easy, but I think we should give our children an ideal to strive toward. Tell them to delay sexual experiences until adulthood, and to try to keep their lifetime partners as close to one as possible. Tell them that "exploring" is likely to be followed, sooner or later, by regret, while"waiting" has only benefits. I would also emphasize that although certain beliefs and behaviors may be common, it's no indication they are healthy. Good luck to all parents out there. It's:-) a changing world, but may we continue to teach the truth within our homes and in other places where we still can. Tue, 18 Jun 2013 03:14:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment663265324 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment663217169I believe we should teach our children by example. I admit that it's not always easy, but we should give our kids an ideal to strive toward. Tell them to delay sexual experiences until adulthood, and try to keep their lifetime partners as close to one as possible. Tell them that "exploring " is likely to be followed,sooner or later, by regret, while waiting has only benefits. I would also emphasise that although certain beliefs and behaviors may be common, it's no indication they are healthy. Good luck to parents everywhere, it's a changing world out there. But lets not stop teach truth within our own homes! Tue, 18 Jun 2013 01:14:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment663217169 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662757870Amen to that Theresa! Mon, 17 Jun 2013 07:43:40 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662757870 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662646628What about the Dead-Beat Mums who not only kick out their husbands from their children's lives (with no real justification) but then go on to do it again.. and again.. and again..? Your ignorant statement is nothing more than propaganda and an appallingly transparent undermining of the family. The facts are that 4 of every 5 divorces are initiated and filed for by mothers and that fathers are by far the least likely to file for divorce, the result is that most divorces are unilaterally decided. Now I can may be accept that 50% of divorced fathers may be bad dads, but you are (in your smug deceit) wanting us to to believe the figure is something like 85%. Your so called "dead-beat" dad may also be a Father who has been hounded out of his children's lives, suffered the arrogation of most if not all of his resources and be forced into poverty whilst having to shoulder all the responsibilities of a Husband and a Father and enjoy none of the benefits. Your statement is nothing more than simplistic nonsense typical of the thoughtlessness which sees only bad in men and only good in women, when the facts when properly investigated report an entirely different story. No one is saying there are no dead-beat dads, yes there are, but the way you paint the story there are ONLY dead-beat dads and no dead-beat mums. Mon, 17 Jun 2013 02:55:16 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662646628 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662620165Very true Jazcat. One man, one woman is vital for production of a healthy family. Mon, 17 Jun 2013 01:49:48 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662620165 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662608226I'm sorry to hear about your child Joan. That's very sad. I just want to tell you, that all you have written is part of the sex education that I teach my children. Not as technically as you have put it, but the same none the less. After her body recognizes his sperm as familiar and hostility towards it is switched off, his sperm nourishes and matures the womb to prepare it to receive their child when they finally do conceive. Multiple partners confuses her body. I have scoured everywhere for information to teach my children thoroughly about sex, life, marriage etc. If they do stuff up, it will be done with full knowledge. Thankfully, they have seen for themselves with their own friends, that life is hard without Dad. Mon, 17 Jun 2013 01:17:53 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662608226 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662190631Full term pregnancy 85% of these cells will be mature, with additional maturation occurring with up to 12 months of breast feeding. With breast feeding oxytocin is stimulated and the bonding between mother, baby and father becomes stronger. When the baby is weaned the breast cells revert to T3 cells which are still highly protective against breast cancer. Yes some women do inherit genes that predispose a woman to breast cancer, however the endocrinologist and breast cancer specialist who have done this research have identified the protective effect of bringing a baby to term when they are relatively young even in these women. Unfortunately the breast cancer statistics in the UK will follow the pattern that is already in the USA where a high rate of invasive breast cancer in 20-29 years old women is occurring. Policies that encourage early sexualisation of young people does not work. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 08:12:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662190631 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662186967I should have included the important information that with a loss of cervical maturity, the mucous plug does not form or is thinner in consistency, so an adolescent females chance of becoming infected with sexually transmitted diseases including HIV is higher as is her chance of becoming pregnant. A recent report produced in the UK identified the number of young women having repeat abortions is also higher, as they tend to view abortion as a contraceptive. A leading Endocrinologist has identified that young girls who have abortions are particularly prone to breast cancer, particularly if they are using contraceptives. The physiological reason is breast tissue in early stages is predominantly comprised of T1 cells that reproduce rapidly when exposed to oestrogen and progesterone and therefore prone to mutation and to develop intraductal cancer. T2 cells are also formed in lower numbers which can mutate to intralobular cancer. Maturation of breast tissue to T4 level which actually provides a life-long protection to breast cancer does not occur for 72% of breast cells until post week 32 of pregnancy when a hormone produced by the placenta will change these immature cells to breast producing cells. TBC Sun, 16 Jun 2013 08:02:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662186967 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662165119I spoke earlier of the unconscious bonding between a father and his children, this becomes more overt as a realisation that a baby is growing within the uterus, feeling the first kicks, the hand movements, then the incredible excitement with the birth of his baby, one that he has a biological connection to and neurological bonding. One of the dominant features is wanting to support the mother of his child, to play, to test the boundaries yet protect the child from harm. Therefore a good father will encourage his daughter to maintain her chastity until she has developed a strong relationship with a man who like her father is prepared to make a commitment. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 07:14:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662165119 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662161214How does chastity contribute to a woman's ability to be involved with a healthy and happy motherhood? 1. From the time of first ovulation, it takes five full years of oestrogen production before she reaches full gynaecological development, this includes the multi-layered cells within the cervix. One of the functions of these cells is to produce a thick plug of mucous for up to 14 days of the month. This provides a barrier to fertilisation and protects against pelvic infection. During the fertile time, this mucous thins, other cells within the cervix produce nutrients that allow the sperm to remain viable for a few days, cilia assist the sperm to swim toward the upper part of the uterus, through the fallopian tube where the strongest will unite with a fertile ova released only once a month. An unfertilised ova only survives for 24 - 48 hours. Endocrinology studies have clearly demonstrated that providing an adolescent with contraceptives before this process has been completed, blocks the full development of the cervical layers. Also abortion during this period of their life will cause severe damage to the uterus so infertility levels will be higher. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 07:03:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662161214 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662119935There is a book "Fatherless America" by David Blankenhon ( in America) It is worth reading. On account of the modern trend, the sacredness of marriage is being lost. When selfishness, sexual pleasures and refusal to accept religious teachings take front seat in the minds of the youngsters, there cannot be any importance or sanctity for fathers; fathers are just a kind of sperm traders only. To change this attitude a good deal of dedicated work is required on the part of good families and the Church Hierarchy. If these two agencies work hard there will be great reverence for God and decency Sun, 16 Jun 2013 05:24:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662119935 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662074379A bond such has this cannot be attained through homosexual expression, it requires the intimacy of conjugality to attain such a close bonding of father, mother and child. Separation of the sexual act from conception through the use of IVF, particularly when one partner is not biologically related to the child, abuse of alcohol and drugs, pornography particularly when used at pre-adolescent and adolescents years (as their brains are still developing to mature levels) reduces a couples ability to form this strong bond. Study after study has demonstrated that chastity before marriage, natural family planning methods rather than use of contraceptives, leads to longer lasting more loving relationships. Vasopressin and oxytocin production actually interferes with the pathways that lead to addictive sexual behaviour. More on that later. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 03:38:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662074379 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662066841I believe this unconscious bond that is formed when the child is conceived in the womb, is the underlying reason why people who choose abortion experience higher rates of suicide, major accidents, domestic violence and homicide particularly within two months and at coinciding with the time the childs birth dates would be due, heavy drinking and/or drug taking. A pattern repeated over another five years, particularly for women. There have been powerful studies by Reardon et al and many others that have demonstrated these patterns. To me this means people who have made this choice urgently require empathetic and knowlegeable counselling preferably before that choice is taken, but certainly following such a decision, so they can find life and hope within themselves again. Throughout a childs growth and development a fathers love and guidance is essential whether they are male or female. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 03:19:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662066841 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662065282The Chemistry of Love is significant information that needs to be more widely told. It is the bond of love that comes from a man who truly loves his wife Vasopressin that stimulates production of Oxytocin within her which in turn is tansferred to a the child conceived in the womb and is repeated every time they make love. This neurological bond is powerful and lasts a lifetime. Anyone who has lost a child through death (we have she was only 9.5 months - sudden death syndrome -bursting at the seams with life beforehound) will speak of an incredibly deep grief that results, you actually feel that part of you has died when your child dies. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 03:16:05 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment662065282 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661868532If many men do not become fathers but only sperm donors, then the number of men learning the path of self-sacrifice in order to give and sustain life is going to decline. I think it is time for a campaign to take seriously the needs of children and the provision of those needs. Those bringing children into the world need to be asked to form a covenant agreement with their nations that they will provide the emotional, intellectual, spiritual and moral support for those children. Sat, 15 Jun 2013 19:51:00 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661868532 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661858984The Welfare State here in the US could not exist without the assistance of absentee, dead-beat fathers. In fact gay marriage would be unthinkable if it weren't for irresponsible bio-dads (hey, maybe there should be a separate Bio-Dad Day)! After all, one of the principal arguments in favor of gay marriage is that many long-term gay relationships offer more stability to children than the chaotic relationships of dead-beat serial inseminators! Two dads or two moms are better than no dad, n'est pas? Sat, 15 Jun 2013 19:28:33 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661858984 http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661731784Thank God for those men who care enough about their children to love their children's mothers to marry and make a family with them. Criticize me all you want but I think more women were smarter in the past then to put themselves and their children in that life style. Sat, 15 Jun 2013 14:36:10 +0000http://www.mercatornet.com/conjugality/view/12335/#IDComment661731784