en-us https://www.intensedebate.com/users/764296 Comments by explrr16 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment70039703 If this letter itself is eye opening, I cannot imagine how incredibly more eye opening it would be to actually hang out with the lifers in prison for a while and get to know them for real. From the way this lifer speaks, I feel as though everybody in society should get a taste of being a lifer. The compassion he talks about in his letter is not seen around in the real world to this extent. It is more difficult for people who have not suffered to have compassion to the extent that those who have suffered. Unless we know what it is like to be in the shoes of somebody else, we cannot truly understand and feel true compassion for them. This is true for even some of the biggest disasters that strike the world. I wish these lifers could be let out. What is stopping our society to let them free except for the fact that society has them judged so incorrectly? We are all so quick to judge people, and it is completely natural and acceptable to an extent. Stereotyping helps our brains simplify the world to keep it organized and keep it from over thinking. However, I also feel that people who have genuinely changed and show remorse should be set free. Those of us outside the prison could learn so much about humanity and the ability to change from them. I have never visited a prison, but I think it would be such a surreal experience. There would be so many stereotypes and judgments broken and corrected. However, I do understand that not all of the lifers have changed and should be set free. Some people deserve to be locked up for life to keep the world safe. Moving on, I just told my roommates about this letter and told them how it is amazing to see that what we always assumed is actually not true. However, they would not believe me and simply refused to listen to the letter or read it. They said theres no such thing and that they are in prison for a reason. I asked them to open their minds, but they refused to do it in this case. It blows my mind when I hear this type of close-mindedness. I guess we all know and say that we cannot judge a book by its cover, but we all do it anyway. I feel as though visiting the prisoners would be a very cool experience. Maybe we should start having field trips from schools and try to spread the word. Then, maybe these prisoners would be set free if they deserve to be. Sat, 24 Apr 2010 04:57:40 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/letter-from-an-inmate__trashed/#IDComment70039703 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-people-who-can-only-afford-hard-work__trashed/#IDComment70043186 This issue really sucks, and it is a part of life. Some people can afford to work, and others cannot. Some people need to come here for a better life or go elsewhere, but they just do not have the resources to do so. I feel as though a lot of people’s lives are determined simply by luck and resources. It sort of goes with the idea of “survival of the fittest”. It is not fair, but not everybody can be on top or be successful and live comfortable lives. Otherwise there would be no variation and positions of power in the world. Sat, 24 Apr 2010 01:10:29 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-about-people-who-can-only-afford-hard-work__trashed/#IDComment70043186 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/300000-whats-it-mean-to-us__trashed/#IDComment70041543 I feel as though it is in human nature to react more to something personally touching to us rather than for others. My mom always tells me that I could have the best of friends, but nobody but my parents would be there for me until the very end no matter what. She tells me that others will care about you to an extent, but in the end, it comes down to my parents who will truly be there for me. I can see that applying for all of us. We feel for others deeply, but we cannot embrace their problems as our own very easily. Sat, 24 Apr 2010 01:04:16 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/300000-whats-it-mean-to-us__trashed/#IDComment70041543 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/christian-invaders-the-turnaround__trashed/#IDComment68453443 I think it is really cool that Sam made us see through the eyes of the Muslims living in Iraq. I got to see a different side of this war in Iraq. I understand that a part of the reason for the war has to do with oil, but I do not really know if it is all about the Christian invaders. I see that it has something to do with why the Muslims do not like the people coming into bomb Iraq because of the evidence presented in class such as the protests. It really is difficult to really understand what is going on unless we put ourselves fully into the shoes of others. Sat, 17 Apr 2010 01:04:17 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/christian-invaders-the-turnaround__trashed/#IDComment68453443 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/women__trashed/#IDComment68431338 I liked the skit in class, especially because it showed a different side to boob jobs. Most of the time we see girls trying to get breast augmentation. This time, I saw something that I can actually relate to- breast reduction. However, something really bothered me. I have always had a problem having bigger breasts, and the dialogue of the girl who was trying to get reductions made my insecurities increase. She said some things that even I had never thought of, and now I am even more concerned. For example, she said that big boobs made her look like a mom and that guys looked at her and thought of their moms’ breasts. That was disturbing because I never thought of it that way. I always thought most men preferred larger breasts. Anyway, I believe that the media has a way of portraying women in ways that they “should” look. However, I think media and real people work together to produce this desirable image that other girls have to struggle with for not having. The media takes what it sees around, and it magnifies it to an extreme. Other times, certain trends start in the inner workings of the fashion industry and pop up in every store and magazine that girls come into contact with. Therefore, we are forced to conform to certain things. This controls body image. Something I have noticed is that sizes are getting smaller and smaller. What used to be a small is now a medium or large. I personally realized that I have to sometimes get a size larger than I normally would and it would upset me because I would think that I am no longer considered “thin”. I have some clothes from years ago, and compared to the clothes I buy now, the smaller sizes back then are actually bigger than the larger sized clothing I buy now. When it comes to body shape, it used to be considered desirable to have a curvy body with big breasts and curvy butts. Now, it seems that every model and most clothing call for stick-like shapes. Girls no longer want to have large boobs hanging off their bodies and large butts that just attract way too much attention. Something that I also noticed in class when girls talked about wanting smaller boobs was that none of the guys around me disagreed. Normally, people comment around me when they agree with things. During the class on “bleeding”, an uproar came about amongst the guys. However, the guys around me did not seem to disagree that smaller boobs were preferred. I also agree that girls dress for each other because guys do not always notice outfits the way we do. Fri, 16 Apr 2010 21:37:02 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/women__trashed/#IDComment68431338 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-if-we-got-rid-of-welfare__trashed/#IDComment65628929 Welfare seems to be a cycle in the lives of people who are on it. The parents are on it, so the children are on it, and then the children become adults on welfare and have children of their own on welfare. There just does not seem to be an end to this cycle. Cutting off welfare once and for all would put so many children at a disadvantage, but I feel as though once it is cut off, the cycle would end. I am in no way saying that this is right or wrong, but if welfare was to be cut off right now, anyone who needs it may just have to suffer and try to make their lives better on their own. The people who got welfare before and who will be born without welfare will be at an advantage because they will not be affected in a negative way. The new children that would be born would maybe even be able to live better lives and learn to make their lives easier by getting higher educations and things like that because they would be forced to do it. I do not know everything about welfare, so I cannot say that this would work or not, but it is just a thought. I do know that many people seem to look down at it and think of it as though the people on it are inferior and too incapable of doing good for themselves. However, there are many different reasons for why people get stuck in this welfare cycle, and a main aspect of it is being born into it. If welfare was to be shut down completely, people would be forced to get jobs and support themselves. Maybe it would not be so bad. However, it is the children that most of us worry about because they have no voice in their living conditions. Maybe the government could find a way to create more jobs (even though that is what it is trying to do right now because of the economy) so that the people on welfare would have to work and pay for their own things. Or it could give hand outs up to a certain extent to those families with children who are on welfare. Then, they could use these hand outs as starting points and move on from there to better their lives and put their kids through school and even college. There has to be some way to get people out of poverty, and the government should make it a priority to figure out a way to achieve this. Even if welfare is not cut off completely, it definitely needs to be scratched and redone. Fri, 2 Apr 2010 21:47:22 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/what-if-we-got-rid-of-welfare__trashed/#IDComment65628929 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/is-quality-the-question__trashed/#IDComment65623416 This is actually a really good point that I, along with many people probably, have never thought about. If medical schools and even other higher level schools and professional training use affirmative action, many incapable people would get in over many capable people who could succeed and advance in the medical field or even some other professional field. Unfortunately, a lot of your success is based on luck and who you know. I have been to several doctors who seem like they do not have a clue as to what they are doing along with some really great ones. It is just how things are, and we really should be able to let people in based solely on capability. Fri, 2 Apr 2010 21:28:48 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/04/is-quality-the-question__trashed/#IDComment65623416 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-about-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment65621387 I think it really sucks that this guy does not know how to identify himself when he is a mix of two completely different races and ethnicities. I feel as though this is a real issue for many multiracial people right now, but in the future, it will be so common that it will no longer be much of an issue to people. Maybe people will stop referring to themselves based on what they look like or where they come from. That would be pretty cool to see happen if it could. I guess he could just identify himself as whatever he wants. Maybe being multiracial gives him an option or set of choices as to what he wants to be. Fri, 2 Apr 2010 21:22:04 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-about-multiracial-people__trashed/#IDComment65621387 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/whats-the-big-deal-with-periods__trashed/#IDComment64276498 I actually laughed out loud when I heard the girl in the video say she was bleeding at the moment. It takes some courage to admit that on camera for 700 or more students to see. I guess it is strange that I feel the need to have courage to admit something so natural. While I never have a problem telling my girl friends that I am on my period, I normally do not announce it to my guy friends. This is simply because guys get so grossed out by the thought of it, even though there is nothing unnatural about it. I have told my guy friends in the past if it was relevant to what we were talking about or doing, but I feel as though it is all too much of a sensitive subject for boys to handle. Sat, 27 Mar 2010 00:49:41 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/whats-the-big-deal-with-periods__trashed/#IDComment64276498 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64276456 I like that this girl asked if tampons would be free if men could menstruate. This really helps me think about the “male dominance” in our society and the world all around. I think that tampons would probably be either a whole lot cheaper or provided for free if guys did get periods. Also, I agree with some of the posts that have been from the guys saying that the reason that men are so uncomfortable and uneducated about menstruation is because girls are not willing or too ashamed to talk about it. I do not see anything wrong with educating the guys as long as guys keep an open mind about it. Sat, 27 Mar 2010 00:49:06 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/if-men-could-menstruate__trashed/#IDComment64276456 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/in-her-own-words__trashed/#IDComment64276396 I cannot believe how ashamed and uncomfortable girls are to talk about their periods. I mean, it’s a natural bodily function, and we all go through it. I cannot believe how some of the girls reacted in class to Sam’s discussion on menstruation. I was actually expecting every girl to appreciate what he was saying. Instead, some girls were getting offended and becoming defensive for no reason. It is not like he was insulting anybody or saying anything bad about menstruation. In fact, he made many girls feel better about it and made the ignorant guys in class see that it is a completely natural and acceptable part of life. Also, it was not even the girls talking about their periods in particular or Sam pointing out girls and talking to them about it. Rather, the man was talking about menstruation in general. So, why the hell should any girl be so offended in the class? Why must we be so ashamed to be comfortable in our skin, especially with things that we have absolutely no control over (well except for birth control pills)? Although, I cannot completely blame the girls for being ignorant. The guys in class were gagging and making negative comments all over the classroom and even walking out. Guys also play a role in women’s discomfort in this matter because they make us think it is so horrible and disgusting to talk about. I also really liked what Sam said about what his wife goes through every 28 days, and how wrong it is for her to have to hide it or make excuses for it. She emphasizes this in her act on the blog, too. Why should she, or any female, carry this burden of having a monthly period and feeling so awful physically and mentally without being able to talk about it or express it in any way. It sounds like Sam’s wife has it really bad, too. Some of us do not get cramps or get so much pain that we cannot get out of bed. We are the lucky ones. Those females like Sam’s wife are not so lucky. If only men could feel how women feel during their periods the world would be a different place. I really have an appreciation with Sam’s wife for being able to talk so openly about this. I even have an appreciation with Sam for being so comfortable about talking about this matter in class and trying to make the girls feel more comfortable in their own skin. I really liked Laurie’s performance, and I think women should be more like her in expressing their feelings. Maybe men’s views would be altered if that happened. Sat, 27 Mar 2010 00:48:27 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/in-her-own-words__trashed/#IDComment64276396 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/women-and-sports__trashed/#IDComment63087221 Why is it so acceptable for men to coach women teams but not okay if women teach men teams? A woman is just as capable as a man when it comes to coaching. It is bad enough that there are no major women football teams, and many women are denied from playing on football teams. The coach does not even play the sport, so why should there be such a big deal about a woman coaching the men? Men football could learn a thing or two by many women I know because the women are good at football. It sucks that sexism exists so evidently in our society. Women can be just as good at sports and know just as much about football as any guy. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:21:51 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/women-and-sports__trashed/#IDComment63087221 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-to-do-about-white-guilt__trashed/#IDComment63086408 I love how white people write and teach history. I also like how it’s always in a way that makes them seem innocent and like they never did anything wrong. I guess it is because nobody wants to find fault in themselves. We are taught throughout school in the “white perspective”. I never questioned it before because it was so integrated into my school curriculum. However, I now realize that we are taught to think white people are the innocent ones when they really are not. In the same way, we are taught in American history that Americans are completely innocent. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:14:18 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/what-to-do-about-white-guilt__trashed/#IDComment63086408 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085507 I can finally think for myself without my family influencing my thoughts. All in all, Laurie’s book was eye opening and effective in showing a different side to the race relations table. I now see that white people are not the only racist ones in the world. Black and brown people can be, too! Maybe we should all try to put ourselves in the shoes of people of different color instead of judging them and trying to guess what their attitudes really are. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:05:36 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085507 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085485 I know that my family members would be opposed to me marrying someone outside of their color. I realize that many of our racist attitudes come from our families and the environments we grew up in. Coming to college, I have realized how much my family’s attitudes affected my own before. I have changed my attitude towards different people and do not have the same attitudes towards certain people like my family does. College opened up my eyes through the classes I have taken and the people I have interacted with. This makes me realize the importance of getting away from your home and interacting with people different than you because you really learn to change your way of thinking. Your attitudes and behaviors towards people change, and you become more open-minded. I have changed my attitudes and way of thinking because I am away from my family so much. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:05:23 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085485 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085437 Therefore, anybody can be racist. Being a person of color, I have seen this happening first-hand. It happens amongst my family members and friends. While I do not agree with their comments usually, I am surrounded by such racist remarks about people who are “white” and “black”. I am sure a lot of people can identify with me in this aspect since most of us come from families with some racist attitudes. For example, family members may be opposed to the children dating a person of a different color. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:04:55 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085437 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085364 I just felt that we have such an inappropriate view of ourselves, and we love to act like we are the innocent ones in the race game. I thought being racist meant that you have prejudice attitude against a person of another color. Nowhere in that “definition” does it say that it means white people have a prejudice attitude against people of color. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:04:10 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085364 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085277 After reading Laurie Mulvey’s book, I realized that white people should not be the only ones looked at as “racist” or prejudice. I guess I always knew that, but her book brought my attention to the issue even more. I was a bit angered by the attitudes of the non-white people in the race relations groups because they were the ones being ignorant. They did not even bother to take the time to listen to the white people and just accused them of being the ignorant ones. Sat, 20 Mar 2010 02:03:21 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/is-anyone-else-getting-this-stuff__trashed/#IDComment63085277 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/fired-for-a-scarf__trashed/#IDComment59943881 I have known some people who have worked at Hollister and Abercrombie and Fitch. I have even heard stories about how the workers are weighed to see if they are fit to work in the front. I do not know how true that really is. Little things have a way of escalating into completely ridiculous things. Anyway, I do know that they have two types of employees- the models and the people who work in the back. The models get to work in the front where everyone in the store can see them. They also work the cash registers. I have never actually bought anything for myself in either store, but I have gone inside with my friends. I also noticed how the models were very attractive, physically fit, and white. I also saw how their bodies were the perfect fit for the type of clothing that those stores sell. The people that might be considered not attractive enough or with the wrong body type are usually the ones that get to work in the back where no customers can see them. My one friend, who worked at Abercrombie as the person in the back, had to come out onto the floor to find her manager and ask him a question. She told me how her manager yelled at her for coming out onto the floor where everyone could see her. He told her she was supposed to always stay in the back and never come onto the floor. I was disgusted and appalled at this. This story mixed with the story I heard about the employees getting weighed, and my disgust just grew for the store. However, I let it go thinking that things are not always what they sound like. Word travels similarly to the game telephone where it starts out as one thing, and with travel, ends up being something completely different. However, the situation of this girl shows me that these stories that I have heard may not be so false afterall. Nobody should be told to take off a religious head scarf to protect the image of the store. I have to agree with some of the things that Mullabhai said in his or her post. The store may as well just put up a sign saying they are only hiring white people and even put it in the application that they prefer white people. They should also say they prefer people with their particular body types while they are at it. Many people of color shop at these stores, and I wish word could get out more about the discrimination that goes on here so they could stop supporting such a store with such high prices. Fri, 5 Mar 2010 21:53:26 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/03/fired-for-a-scarf__trashed/#IDComment59943881 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment59905383 I really do not think that white people decided to get together and celebrate and party while trying to offend black people. I think people just want to have fun, and themes are a great way to change up the usual party scene we all experience. Nobody is stopped from throwing or attending a themed party, so any colored people can participate. If white people really came up with themed parties to offend black people, why would they throw parties that make fun of other white people? For example, there has always been the popular “white trash” theme, as well as the more recently popular “Jersey Shore” theme, which pokes fun at “Guidos”. Maybe we should just stop trying to find the racism in everything, especially parties, and just enjoy ourselves. Fri, 5 Mar 2010 16:34:04 +0000 https://www.racerelationsproject.org/2010/02/whats-with-the-theme-parties__trashed/#IDComment59905383