I had a father who made it clear every day (and still does) that he begrudged every cent ever spent on my care, every bite of food I ever took, every inch of space I ever took up. No expense was too high if it was for his enjoyment; every expense was too high, if it was for the needs of his family. There was no forgiveness and still isn’t; he drags out things that happened decades ago as if they were yesterday, while expecting the rest of us to forgive and forget such things as repeated infidelities, physical and emotional abuse and neglect. His egregious words and actions are always chalked up to everyone ELSE’S accounts, never his own responsibility. He SAYS he loves this person or that. He lies.

Fathers (and mothers): THINK about what your relationship with your children will do to their relationships with God. You’re their template; if your child believes that you don’t want her or that she’s not worth much to you, then it’s likely (not a given, but probable) that she’ll view the loving Father with suspicion. It doesn’t matter if you’re parked on a church pew every time the doors are open. What matters is what you do and how you act the rest of the week.

I am so glad (sincerely) that many kids–including my own–have awesome men for their fathers. I can tell you from firsthand experience that having a terrible father can be worse than having none at all.

I wanna! I wanna!

Several people have written to tell us that they've printed this out and passed it to other people, or forwarded the link.

Thank you.

Much appreciated, Kevin! Any encouragement is welcome.

I'm likin' the wife-and-mommy gig pretty well, too.

Yay!

Best. Post. EVER.

I love you so much, sweetie. Couldn't stand to be without you. You are my hero and my happy ending; you really and truly are. Thank you.

Aw, I don't want you to think dark thoughts and stuff. Think of happy puppies frolicking in sunny meadows. Think of the laughter of children.

As they kick puppies.

Aaaaaannnnd here we are at the dark thought place again.

"Of COURSE I've got a secret identity...who wants to go to the supermarket as ElastiGirl, y'know what I mean?"

Actually, honey, I'm thinking we're going to have to put the kid through some kind of Wii detox program. He'd spend 20 hours a day on that thing if I let him. Seven is supposed to be too young for a 12-step program, but I'm going to look into PBSkids.org and see if they've got a version with Ruff Ruffman or something.