"I was getting too involved in the lives of some of the young couples/new parents we both know. In my desire to know and be known, pray together and exchange ideas, I had apparently come on too strong."
Sounds like radical love, to me. I'm not a big fan of safety and boundaries. That annoys some folks.

I'm curious: do you think it was too strong? Was the couple uncomfortable? (Is uncomfortable always a bad thing?) Do you wish you'd done things differently? What was it like for you to connect with them?

I *love* exchanging ideas. I think some people don't like that much, either. :)

"I think I suffer from a case of, this is already being done by some, I want something new, something more. I feel like I should just go with the flow and go wherever I see the Holy Spirit moving, but yet I have this need, this drive, to change the world. To break new ground."

Oh, this I get! I have had a similar feeling. I don't want to go work in somebody's soup kitchen. I want to shake things up, bring about a radical shift in consciousness, even if only a tiny bit at a time, and even if most of the work is done on my own consciousness. Hence the Radical Love Project.

It would be so fun to get to talk in person. Maybe at a conference one of these days...

Angela

Wow, Theresa! What I'm hearing here is a lot of passion, that you're getting a glimpse of the life that Jesus tells us is possible. Yes? I know that for me, when I get those glimpses, and realize the beautiful things I can choose, it can be electrifying. I am so grateful to God for giving us this ability to create, to change direction in every moment.

But then, with that ability comes the difficulty of figuring out what direction to go in, and what direction to turn away from. Because when I chose one thing, there's always something else I'm giving up.

When I feel jumbled about what I'm doing, wanting and not-wanting at the same time, I don't usually find answers until I sit down and quiet my mind, breathe, and listen for God's answers.

Some folks say that if you have felt a calling and then find yourself not wanting to do the work, you should just push on. For me, though, those feelings of not wanting are usually a clue that I need to do more listening. When I surrender and let God lead, I feel peace and a sense of rightness, even in the face of difficulty.

Does that fit with your experience?

The blog seems to have eaten Theresa's other comment, so I'm reposting here:

Theresa Seeber said:
Thank you for that insight! As we were driving today I pointed my children to look out the front window, where the road was blocked off by police, ambulance, and fire vehicles. We prayed for the people involved in whatever was going on out there, and I realized again that not all systems are bad, and thanked God for the systems that cause all of those people to be out there helping the people in need outside my window. I do however worry when the body of Christ is a system, whether corrupted or not, because it seems to suck some of the true life out of it. Just some things on my mind lately. Also, I loved your last comment the most: "Just like to criticize or respond to a blog post or article is to care about the conversation (and the blogger). " That just shows me the kindness of God. I'll take that anytime I can get it!

Thanks for the kind words, Tripp.

Do we know the difference? Apparently not, yet. From the story of our very beginning in the garden, it's been about our being scared that it's not enough to say "yes" to God. We say yes, then (when we think God's not looking) we start trying to protect ourselves and our interests.

I'm going to try to keep learning the difference. Grace is so much sweeter than being "safe."

If we still lived in Bend, I'd be there! That place's vegetation was a mystery to me.

Hey, maybe you're right! I'm always struggling to know which way the path of love leads. I am so glad to have you (all) here to help me look for it.

Thanks for that response, Brian. I appreciate how you contribute to this conversation, and help me think about difficult things.

I wasn't saying that Obama is Caesar. I was saying that the thing he's become a part of is (like) Caesar, in that it approaches problems on a huge scale, and does damage even when its intentions are good. I don't worship the "free market"--my atheist friends are disgusted by my "apostasy" there, too. But I think there's something new coming... something completely different than the system that's failed, over and over, to bring us true peace and compassion.

I worry about lifting programs up and pushing the message of Jesus down, because I really believe that only love can do what needs to be done.

I'd be much happier, for instance, joining a big party in Washington that was intended to remind Obama that "yes we can" and that he has our support in embodying love as he intended to, rather than holding him "accountable." That just seems so... adversarial. And adversarial isn't part of the vision of the kingdom that burns in my heart.

Thanks again for the conversation, Brian. I appreciate so much the work that you do.

Ouch! Brian McLaren, who I love, being "mocked, ridiculed... crucified"? "Misguided and more hurtful than good"? Wow, guys. My heart is aching.

For the record, if you're listening, Brian, I adore you, both your philosophy and your heart. Otherwise, why would I question?

Sounds like you're really feeling bombarded by all the ideas around you, and are longing for a quiet mind, so you can listen for the voice of God. Is that was you're saying?

Thanks, dood. I needed that today.
Angela